Stuck ? How to shift your mindset

How to Get Unstuck and Create the Change Youve Been Searching For

Ever feel like you’re just stuck? Is this it? How did I end up here? Well, as a sales and personal transformation coach, most of the individuals I coach are stuck in their heads and can’t seem to figure out how to get off the hamster wheel of their own thinking. Round and round their minds and their results go, always ending up back in the same unsatisfactory place.?The bulk of the work I do is to support people and businesses get unstuck and create the change they want.

Our thoughts create our reality.

According to the latest in brain science, the way we think shapes the way we live. How we think translates into our behaviors and thereby, our results.

So if you're feeling stuck, it's time to start thinking differently.

STUCK - Which one are you?

Here is an acronym for recognizing where one is stuck in one's thinking using the acronym "STUCK":

S - Stuck in the same old patterns of behaviour

T - Thinking the same old thoughts

U - Unable to see new possibilities

C - Can't seem to move forward

K - Keep getting the same results

When we get stuck in our thinking, it can be difficult to see new possibilities or make changes. All to often, we keep repeating the same patterns and getting the same results.?Einstein encapsulated this best with his quote, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

?Essentially, you’re stuck in the same old patterns. These patterns are known as habitual thought loops. They are habitual patterns of thinking that keep us on auto-pilot, going round and round in circles, ending up in the same place…or something similar. This can be frustrating and often demoralizing. You're unable to see new possibilities. You're convinced that there's no way out of your situation. You can't seem to move forward. Often you’re immobilized by fear, doubt or uncertainty. Same results, different day. You're stuck in a rut.

Follow these 7 steps to knock yourself out of your current thinking predicament.?

So, what can you do about it?

Here are a few tips: It's important to unpack the following steps in a journal or with someone you can trust to listen without judgment or commentary.

Step 1. Write down all of your thoughts.?What are you thinking about? Simply list all your thoughts you have about the issue that's keeping you bogged down.

Step 2. Now note: How are you feeling? Are you feeling stuck, frustrated, or unmotivated? List as many emotions or feelings as you can. A great way to do this is to use a thesaurus. Type in the word “frustration” and see all the other synonyms that are similar and see if any of those words better describe how you are feeling.?

NOTE: When we can identify our thoughts and feelings, we can start to understand how they are affecting us and how we can respond to them in a healthy way. The key here is to simply note them dispassionately, without the stories or the judgments attached.

STEP 3. Where am I placing my power? How do I currently compensate for these emotions. What are the behavioural defense mechanisms which I engage in, in an attempt to make up for this perceived weakness or deficiency??

Some common compensating behaviors include:

Overachievement: This is the tendency to strive for success in all areas of life, even if it is at the expense of other things, such as relationships or health.

Perfectionism: This is the tendency to set unrealistic standards for oneself and to be overly critical of one's own performance.

Withdrawal: This is the tendency to avoid situations that make one feel insecure or inadequate.

Recklessness: This is the tendency to take unnecessary risks, often as a way to prove oneself or to numb out negative feelings.

Sublimation: This is the redirection of unacceptable impulses into socially acceptable activities, such as athletics or creative pursuits.

STEP 4. Write down all of your expectations and assumptions. Example: “I thought by now I would have figured this thing out!” “ It’s not right for my boss to treat me like this!”???Note: You aren’t judging whether your expectations are valid or unrealistic. Just write them down…All of them

STEP 5. Review the facts of the situation. Having listed as many thoughts, feelings and expectations as you have about what you are going through, let's now consider the facts. Just the facts, without your judgments, evaluations, or any mental stories you might have going on inside your head. The idea here is to take a neutral stance. Try to remove your own personal biases and judgments from the situation. Here, the goal is to simply be objective and impartial. Can you notice any repeating patterns of thought and behavior?

Step 6. Recontextualization. In step number five, here is where you’ll begin the mindset shift. Recontextualizing your situation means shifting the meaning of your current point of view about your current issue. Ask, "What's another way I can look at this thing?"?Rising above and looking down on our issue from “on high” helps us see things from a new perspective and understand the world around us in a deeper way. Recontextualizing helps us see the silver lining in every cloud and find the strength to move forward. Look for new perspectives. Try to see things from a different angle. In other words, what's good about this situation that you're just not seeing? What are the new possibilities? Ask, “What if this was happening for my greatest good…?” If I asked my “mentor” about this, how would they view it?

Step 7. Move forward with a new vision of what’s possible. Ask yourself, “What do I truly want?” The ask yourself, “What's the most obvious thing for me to do here to move things forward? What’s the smallest step I can take right now in the direction of my new vision? Without taking myself too far out of my comfort zone, what can I do to step out of my current mindset?”

Step 7. Take considered action. Don't just think about making changes; take steps to make them happen. Be patient. Be kind to yourself. It takes time to change your habitual thinking patterns. Just like changing any habit, it takes?courage, strength, will and discipline to shift your automatic brain response. Remember, in some cases its take years of conditioning. It’s very rare that one can go from “Saul to Paul” overnite.?

In conclusion

I know it's not always easy to change our thinking, but it's possible. Recognizing that you are stuck in your thinking is the first step to getting unstuck. By following these 7 steps, you can start to change your thinking and break free from the rut. With time and effort, you can get unstuck and create the change you want.

?And it's worth it. Because when we change our thinking, we change our lives.