You've got to be prepared to fail.

You've got to be prepared to fail.

"I'm struggling. I don't think I can?do it and?I feel I need apologise for what I'm about to send."

Words I sent to my tutor.

My self belief was at an all time low.

It was 2020 and we were in lockdown.? I was in year 3 of my 6 year part-time degree and I was trying to write an analytical essay about the Romantic Poets!

I cried and cried.

"I can't do it.? I'm not clever enough. I don't know if what I'm writing is correct."

Of course, my tutor encouraged me to send it in anyway.? And yes, you're right, I got a respectable score.

Looking back, that was a Key Pivotal Moment.

My hardest moment.

It did get easier after that but here's what I learnt from that?

1. I learnt to read my feedback.? In the beginning, I just looked at the score as I didn't want to read any negative criticism.? After the KPM,?I started to read it and used it to improve.? ?And I did improve.

2. Life is easier when you believe in yourself.? Anthony Hopkins once said, "Believe, believe, believe and if you don't believe, pretend to believe."

I learnt how to believe in myself.??

The crying during the KPM was the 18 year old me who felt less intelligent than her friends who had been to uni.? To me, they were in a different league, intellectually. My?journey into adulthood had began with a massive chip on my shoulder.? ?

Self-belief can be learnt.? I believe it's a muscle that?can be developed with courage and determination.? ?Saying yes to scary things, sharing your voice when you are nervous and yes, pressing the send button when you think you're going to fail.

3. You don't need to spend 6 years doing a degree to validate your intelligence.? After that KPM, I had achieved what I was looking for.? Belief in my ability.? Luckily, I enjoyed the topic of my degree so the next 3 years were?great especially as I had the self-belief I had always wanted.?

??????

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