If you've ever doubted yourself...

Negative self-talk is unruly and a surefire way to keep your thinking small.

In my experience, most negative self-talk is simply an error in thinking, while some of it stems from an inability to label or feel your feelings.

There is no need to go back to Sally, who stole your toy in kindergarten, or your dad, who never hugged you to explain your propensity for negative self talk. The truth is more simply:

A download issue.

Because of a few simple errors your mind has become fertile ground for negative self thought. Focusing on just one part (because I can’t give it all away, right?), here are four mental traps that distort your thinking and shrink your opportunities...

1?? Overgeneralization

"I messed up that presentation, so I’m terrible at public speaking, and I’ll never be good at it."

This often shows up as?“I’m not good at X,”?where X is something you have an unmet desire for.

Truth:?One tough day doesn’t define your abilities or your future. Even when thinking positively, backward thinking is a comforting error. We use generalization as a mental shortcut to make the future feel more predictable, but when it comes to assessing your potential, it’s useless. Bin it.

2?? Predicting Catastrophes

"I’m going to bomb this interview, and they’ll think I’m a fraud."

Truth:?No one knows the future—you might actually impress them. We’re wired to imagine the worst possible outcomes, and this can be useful if you’re using it as a tool to mitigate risk. But as a constant pattern of thought about your outcomes, it assumes your have full control over every single variable that is involved in a successful outcome. This is false and beyond useless. Bin it.

3?? What-ifs

"What if I make a mistake and everyone notices?"

Truth:?Mistakes happen, but they rarely matter as much as you think. Worse, very few people will care or even notice. Negative?what-ifs?are an inflated sense of self-importance. Most, if not all people, will not care. If you’re going to use your imagination—which is a fantastic thing to do—practice visualising scenarios to reduce risk or imagine future possibilities. It’s still fiction, but much less draining and gives you focus that could shifts outcomes. As I aways remind myself, if the world is there for you to create something imaginary, create something beautiful and meaningful.

4?? Black-and-White Thinking

"If I don’t ace this, it’s over. I’ve failed completely."

Truth:?There’s value in progress, even if it’s small and not perfect. For this gratitude is a game changer. Check out my recommendation for a gratitude journal here. Black-and-white thinking doesn’t exist outside of maybe moral debates. Nothing is completely black or white. Recognize this and practice seeing relative value. Accept the ambiguity, because most results exist in shades of grey.

The Cost of Mental Health in the Workplace

Poor mental health is a massive burden on businesses, costing UK employers approximately ￡51 billion a year. This includes absenteeism (missed work), presenteeism (being at work but underperforming), and staff turnover. Beyond the numbers, it affects morale, collaboration, and innovation. Teaching positive mental health strategies in business isn’t just about being a good human—it’s about unlocking potential, boosting productivity, and creating environments where people and ideas thrive.

How can I help:

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