You're not stupid. Believe in yourself.

You're not stupid. Believe in yourself.

I could never forget that day.

It has been over four months.

Over the course of four months, I decided that I would get into writing.

I didn't know the outcome at all.

It was just walking on a very foggy path.

I had no idea what was about to come.

Every day kept passing by, and I had no idea.

The only thing I did was to wake up and try, I had some experience and just some courses down to let me know that my work made sense.

I had written books already and I have always had this problem of not giving myself enough credit.

I would be doing almost everything in this world, but it still could be better.

Every. Single. Time.

I slowly started falling in love with the process that I was in and my will to fight against the odds just kept increasing.

Now I already had given the amount of dedication that it was enough for me to stick around and not leave it.

I was chasing a dream.

The dream was only mine, so now I have to move out and I would have to earn for it, that's for sure.

Because I was made clear about one thing-

If I had to do something that I wanted then I would have to support myself. All alone.

When this condition was in front of me, I was left with no excuses.

Life gave me another chance to be more productive than ever.

It was a windy night, almost 8 pm.

Dad was having dinner, mom was almost done cooking and I was standing outside of my house, due to tiredness.

Today was another day when I had achieved nothing.

I woke up to nothing.

I promised myself that this month... Would be great for me and this would be the month I would have already moved out.

It was 2 of the month. All I had was crushed hopes.

I stood silent as the realisation hit me.

All I had was...

A lot of companies which ghosted me after samples, HR's who never reverted back to me, unanswered emails and pain.

I stood outside of my house feeling alone as the cold wind hit my face.

It has been so long since I cried.

And that mere thought was enough for my tear to leave their threshold and tears started touching the ground.

I still clearly remember wiping my tears from the inner side of my XXL red T-shirt which said "courage and persistence" on it.

I cried, saw vehicles passing by and continued for 5 minutes telling myself the exact thing, "It's okay... Cry, you're not weak. The time is. Please just be more strong, and you got this I promise... I am doing my best. You got this. Your writing isn't bad just because some people didn't accept you. You still have potential and I promise I have your back."

As mom tapped my shoulder looking tensed. She was the only person who knew how much I was craving moving out of the environment I was in.

She hugged me and took me for a night walk.

"How long it took for Edison to make a bulb?"

I kept walking silently as I heard her say this for the 9th time this month.

"Mom... Can we walk..." I said groaning from a headache.

She repeated herself, "Tell me how long it took for Edison to make a bulb, Ishu!"

I exhaled, shook my head and answered, "Ten thousand times mom..." ( I remember telling this to her in 9th standard when I read?a quote from him.)

"See... He continued after the 50th failure... After 200... After 2000... After 7000... Oh my god how did he even continue, why wasn't he sobbing in the corner of his room saying, fuck it I quit!"

I chuckled slightly listening to her without any filter.

"I believe in you, and keep believing in yourself. I promise your bulb is about to light up too... Okay? Now be the strong girl you're and continue."

She is like this. The light to my world.

I woke up the next day at 9... Again... Fueled to continue to annoy people to give me one opportunity.

And as I opened my mail, there it was, My offer letter.

And from there... I don't remember stopping.

Thanks, mom.

So yeah... Could you tell me what the lesson was? Yeah... That you got to believe in yourself, you're not stupid, just stay in the game.

All the very best.?