You’re Ruminating: How to Separate Pressure from Stress

Why is it possible that two people can go through the same, intense event, yet each have very different responses. The event might leave one person feeling stressed, while the other person might feel relief or relaxed. Same event, but two vastly different experiences. 

While uncovering what was causing different responses to stressful events, researchers uncovered two big ideas.

First, there is a difference between pressure and stress. Most of us lump these together as if they are the same thing. If you combine pressure and stress together then stress is inevitable. But when you split them apart you now have some options. 

Pressure is defined as external demands in your environment. These could be deadlines, workloads, customer demands. 

Do you think everyone in your team has pressure on them? Of course. Do you think that everyone is stressed? Maybe. Maybe not.

Second, researchers uncovered what people who were getting stressed were doing differently to those that weren’t. To convert pressure into stress you had to Ruminate about events. 

What is Rumination?

Rumination is thinking over and over about events from the past, or future and attaching negative emotion to them.

Think about a time in your life when you felt very stressed and notice the extent to which you were ruminating. Now think of an area of your life where you have high pressure but have no stress. Notice that you don’t ruminate about that area of your life. As part of my work, I meet CEO’s and leaders who have extremely high levels of pressure, but very low stress. But don’t you also know people in your life who have very low levels or pressure, yet very high levels of stress. How do they do it? They sit around and ruminate.

Why Does Rumination Matter?

You might recognize that you ruminate, but why does it matter? It matters for three main reasons. 

The first one is your health. When we anxiously ruminate about imagined future events our body responds as if it is physically threatened and puts us into a state of fight or flight. We produce Adrenaline which speeds up our heart rate. In small doses this is fine but when we keep on ruminating it puts a strain on our heart which leads to the buildup of plaque and increased risk of heart disease. Chronic ruminators have increased incidence of heart attacks.

The second hormone produced is Cortisol, also fine in small doses. But to produce it we put white blood cell production on hold. As a result, chronic ruminators have suppressed immune function. The more we ruminate the more at risk we become of getting sick.

In addition to the negative health effects, ruminators tend to be less productive because they are not mentally present enough to get anything done. They spend much of their time trapped in endless rumination loops inside their head, and while they are busy replaying these stories, what are they not doing? Work!

Finally, how do you feel when you are ruminating on an on. Most people tell me they feel exhausted and miserable. Put all of the above together and we would say there is nothing useful about stress, all it gives you is a shorter, miserable, unproductive life. Other than that, there is nothing wrong with it!

What about ‘good stress’ some people ask?

My uncle who is a successful entrepreneur, said to me, ‘Nick I love stress’.

I explained to him about rumination and asked, ‘Do you love to ruminate?’

‘No, never’ he replied, ‘That is a waste of time.’

What does my uncle love? He loves pressure. He enjoys challenges, goals, deadlines and progress. Many of the leaders I work with are A-type personalities who love pressure. Pressure can he healthy. Rumination just leads to a short, miserable life.

Reflection question – What is the area of your life that you are most likely to ruminate about? How helpful is it?

These ideas are based on the research of Dr. Derek Roger and his Challenge of Change program. The above is an excerpt from my new whitepaper: Pressure is not Stress: 4 steps to be resilient in disruptive times. If you’d like an advance copy, please put your email address in the comments section. Coming your way soon…