The False Promise of Vision

I saw a fantastic standup routine where the comedian talked about how good it felt to think of some good thing that he was going to do. He pictured himself on one of his many first class flights seeing a serviceman walking down the aisle (going to war for his country - "or so he thinks"), and he'd imagine getting up from his first class seat and offering it to the serviceman as a gesture of appreciation. He kept talking about how good that felt, how it made him feel warm and worthy and virtuous.

And then he'd round it off with "but of course, I didn't do it. But I felt like such a good person because I had that thought. What a good person I am for having thought of giving up my seat!"

This way of thinking, funny as it was in his show, is sadly too true in most people's lives and businesses. It's the things we want to do with our kids, and feel really good about thinking or planning, but don't end up creating the time or attention to do. It's the things we business owners want to do for our businesses, and although we love the thought of them happening, we end up not prioritising them.

Then time slips, and it seems like all of a sudden our business hasn't achieved what we hoped it would. Or our kids leave home for uni, and we realise we never quite spent the time passing on those lessons we wanted to pass on, or giving them the undivided attention to build that relationship we hoped we'd have.

I'm sure you've read those books or heard the quotes about the wishes of the dying, or the "no one on his death bed wishes he'd spent more time at work". I call BS on the conclusions those "motivational" authors and speakers want us to draw from this. It's not that those thoughts as recorded aren't true or valid. But in my calculus, I don't want to change 50, 60 or 70 years of my life (i.e. the majority of my breathing days) simply make the last few days or hours of my life wonderful. The maths just doesn't add up.

Instead, I like to think of where I'll be at some point in the future, and figure out what I need to do today in order to get there. In reality, how I do that depends on my mood. If I'm feeling in a good mood, I'll think about where I'd like my business to be in, say, 5 years' time. Then I'll put myself in that projection, and ask what I did today to get there. If I'm feeling in a bad mood, I'll imagine that my business in 5 years' time is exactly where it is today. No progress on any axis is a depressing thought, so I'll then ask myself what I should have been doing differently today to get somewhere better.

And the same is true of my relationship with my kids. I'll imagine what that relationship is like when they're 16, 20 or 40, and if the relationship isn't where I want it to be, I'll think about what it was that I wish I'd done with them today.

And that works.

... Quite often.

But it certainly works more for me than trying to run my life today on the basis of my deathbed tomorrow.

And it works A LOT more than just buying into a "vision" or a "purpose" and feeling good that my work is done.

Because we humans have a strong neurological tendency to feel good when we have a vision, and we'll pay people to help us create that vision. And in too many industries today, especially in coaching, in internet marketing, and in other "fake-it-til-you-make-it" schemes, people have grown fat on selling people the idea that they could achieve and be something special, without having the honesty to sell the work that it takes to get there. It's much easier to sell a vision than the reality of the effort it takes to achieve it.

Just having a vision can be debilitating unless it comes with appreciation of what it takes to get there. And while business owners, and especially those that are millenials, are being pummelled with the importance of their "why" (the subject of another post!), there's little that tells them how much they need to give to their why to make it real. As a result, hope turns to dejection and positivity to cynicism.

So do what it takes to create your vision. But as a part of your calculus, make sure you figure out the price you need to pay in order to make it real.

#vision #entrepreneur #startwithwhy #purpose