Are Your Relationship Skills Holding Back Your Career Dreams?
Anne Dranitsaris, Ph.D.
Helping individuals, couples, and leaders achieve their potential.
Over the years, as I’ve worked with clients across various industries, one thing has stood out—your technical abilities and hard work will only take you so far. The missing piece for many is often relationship skills. Early in my career, I learned that it wasn’t just about knowing how to do the work; it was about building the relationships necessary to thrive in a collaborative environment. And it’s something I’ve seen repeatedly in others—those who don’t develop these crucial interpersonal skills often find their career growth stalls.
Whether you’re trying to build relationships with colleagues, manage up, or connect with mentors, a lack of relationship skills can limit your opportunities and hold you back from reaching your full potential. I’ve experienced it myself, and I’ve seen how it plays out in the lives of others. So let me share what I’ve learned about how poor relationship skills can hinder your career and what you can do to change it.
Why Relationship Skills Matter in the Workplace
You might think that just being good at your job is enough to climb the ladder, but in reality, it’s not. The ability to communicate, collaborate, and connect with others is just as important. I’ve worked with brilliant people whose careers never quite took off because they weren’t able to connect with their colleagues, manage conflicts, or receive feedback constructively.
Relationship skills are what make you more than just competent at your job—they help you become someone people want to work with and support. Here’s a quick overview of the key relationship skills I’ve seen make a difference:
How Poor Relationship Skills Hold Back Your Career
1. Isolation and Lack of Collaboration
In today’s workplace, collaboration is everything. When you don’t have the ability to build strong relationships with your colleagues, you can quickly find yourself isolated. I’ve seen it happen too many times—people with incredible technical skills are passed over for promotions or big projects simply because they aren’t team players. When others don’t feel comfortable working with you, you’re less likely to be included in key opportunities that could advance your career.
2. Inability to Influence and Lead
Leadership is more than just doing your job well—it’s about inspiring and influencing others. I’ve known many talented people who failed to get buy-in for their ideas or struggled to lead because they didn’t have the relationship skills to connect with their teams. If you can’t influence others, it’s nearly impossible to move up in your career because leadership is built on trust and the ability to motivate others.
3. Conflict Escalation and Workplace Tension
When you don’t have strong conflict resolution skills, disagreements at work can quickly escalate into bigger issues. In my own career, I used to avoid conflict, hoping it would resolve on its own, but it never did. Instead, it created tension, making it harder to work effectively. I’ve seen many professionals fall into this trap. When small conflicts turn into major issues, it affects productivity and damage relationships, making it harder for you to be seen as a leader or someone people want to work with.
4. Burnout from Self-Sabotaging Behaviors
Lacking relationship skills can also lead to self-sabotaging behaviors like overextending yourself, saying “yes” to everything, or constantly people-pleasing. I’ve been there—trying to do everything for everyone else and burning out as a result. When you can’t set healthy boundaries, you risk exhaustion, which impacts your performance and your ability to advance in your career.
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5. Missed Career Development Opportunities
Career growth doesn’t happen in a vacuum; it’s often about who you know as much as what you know. Without strong relationships, you’re likely to miss out on critical networking, mentorship, and sponsorship opportunities. I’ve seen many talented individuals stagnate in their careers simply because they didn’t build the relationships necessary to open doors.
How to Start Building Relationship Skills
If you’re realizing that your relationship skills might be holding you back, don’t worry—these skills can be developed. Here are some ways to start:
Investing in your relationship skills is one of the best things you can do for your career. It’s not just about getting ahead—it’s about creating meaningful connections that will support you throughout your professional journey.
Take the Next Step Toward Healthier Relationships
Working with a therapeutic relationship coach like myself is a powerful step toward transforming your relationships and unlocking your full potential. Whether you’re seeking personal growth, career advancement, or simply more fulfilling connections in your life, I’m here to guide you on that journey.
If you’re ready to invest in yourself and your relationships, reach out to schedule a session. Together, we’ll work on the skills and strategies you need to build the relationships—and the career—you truly want.
Whether you find yourself over-giving, seeking approval, or avoiding conflict at work, therapeutic coaching can help you regain control, build healthier connections, and thrive in both your professional and personal life.
Anne Dranitsaris, Ph.D. Psychotherapist, Author, Therapeutic Coach
Contact me for a free consultation to see if Therapeutic Coaching is for you. Email [email protected] to schedule a session.
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Don’t forget to check out Dismantling Dysfunction, our podcast series for anyone who experiences dysfunction in organizations, leadership, or relationships: https://dranitsaris-hilliard.com/podcast/
Power Up Your Innate Potential Facebook Group is a private group to help you meet and mingle with other like-minded individuals who are striving to achieve their potential: https://www.facebook.com/groups/powerupinnatepotential ______