Your Partners' Brains are Playing Hard to Get

Plus: AI prompt for perfect partner presence (without being a stalker)

Remember that song you hated until radio stations played it 47 times a day, and suddenly you're singing it in the shower?

That's not Stockholm syndrome – it's the mere exposure effect. And it's about to become another secret partnership weapon for you!

?The Science Behind "Playing Hard to Get Easy to Like"

Your partners' brains are lazy (no offense, partners). They're hardwired to like things they see often, even if those things are mediocre. It's why McDonald's exists, why your neighbor still uses Internet Explorer, and why enterprise buyers can't stop throwing money at Salesforce.

This isn't just my opinion – it's science. Robert Zajonc proved it, probably while wondering why he kept buying the same terrible coffee every morning.

Why Your Better Product Keeps Losing to Mediocre Competitors

Here's the fascinating part: Zajonc's research showed that repeated exposure works even when people don't realize they're being exposed to something. Your partner's brain is literally keeping a subconscious tally of every time they encounter your brand or product!

Even more interesting? The effect is strongest when the exposures are:

• Brief (quick touches > long presentations)
• Frequent (regular > sporadic)
• Low-pressure (FYI > hard sell)

This explains why that annoying competitor keeps winning deals despite:

• Your better features.
• Your lower prices.
• Your superior support.

They're not better - they're just showing up more often in ways that matter.

The Psychology of Partner Preference

Three core principles make the mere exposure effect especially powerful in partnerships:

1. The Cognitive Ease Principle

• Partners default to vendors they can think about easily.
• Every exposure makes you cognitively "cheaper" to process.
• Familiarity literally makes you less mentally taxing to work with.

2. The Safety Association Loop

• Unknown = risk
• Frequent exposure = familiar
• Familiar = safe
• Safe = recommended to customers

3. The Availability Cascade

• What comes to mind easily feels true.
• What feels true gets recommended.
• What gets recommended creates results.
• Results reinforce the original bias.

The "Always There" Strategy (Without Being That Ex Who Won't Go Away)

1. Leverage Peak-End Psychology

Why it matters: Partners remember the peak moments and the end of interactions. Structure your presence around their high-stakes moments

• Deal support (peaks)
• Quarter close (ends)
• Annual planning (both)

Weekly Presence That Works:

• Share one competitive advantage (specific to current deals).
• Spotlight a partner win (create social proof).
• Drop a customer pain point your solution fixes (real problems only).

2. The "Ambient Value" Framework

Structure your presence around the three psychological triggers that make the mere exposure effect work:

For Partner Sales (The Revenue Drivers):

• Brief: Quick deal support updates.
• Frequent: Weekly win shares.
• Low pressure: FYI-style updates about new capabilities.

For Technical Teams (The Trust Gatekeepers):

• Brief: 5-minute solution tips.
• Frequent: Bi-weekly office hours.
• Low-pressure: Optional deep-dives.

For Executives (The Relationship Owners):

• Brief: Revenue snapshots
• Frequent: Monthly impact updates
• Low-pressure: Strategic insights

?? Reality Check: Your partners are drowning in vendor noise. They ignore 90% of it. But their subconscious is keeping score of every meaningful interaction. Make them count.

Making the Mere Exposure Effect Work for You

Remember: You're not just building awareness - you're creating psychological comfort. Every time you show up (briefly, frequently, and without pressure), you're making it easier for partner teams to choose you.

The Psychological Power Moves Cheat Sheet

1. Leverage primacy effect: Be first in their week.
2. Use recency effect: Close strong before key decisions.
3. Create peak moments: Show up big when it matters most.
4. Build cognitive ease: Make working with you feel effortless.
5. Generate social proof: Let others talk about you.

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AI Learning Lab: The Perfect Partner Presence Prompt

Want to put all this into action? Here's the fun part - let's get AI to do the heavy lifting. I've created a simple prompt that helps you find that perfect balance between "actively present" and "professional stalker." Think of it as your personal partnership presence planner.

Prompt:

Help me create a 30-day partner communication plan that keeps us present but not pushy.

For our key partner communications:

1.What to send (content types)
2.When to send it (timing)
3.How often to check in (frequency)
4.Ways to add value (not noise)

Give me a simple plan that:
. Keeps us top of mind
. Doesn't annoy partners
. Makes engagement easy
. Shows clear value

Format: Give me a weekly plan I can actually follow.        

Until next time!

Ann-Louise S.