Is Your ‘Happy Place’ Accessible?

July is Disability Pride Month, and it has me thinking about ‘happy places’. Go ahead. Picture yours. You know, the physical location that you have an emotional connection to, typically associated with treasured memories. A place that puts a smile on your face and injects a sense of calm. Now let me ask you this: is your happy place accessible? If it were, could it become even happier?

For many of us, our happy places come from our childhood, perhaps a location grounded in nostalgia and a reminder of days when life was far simpler than the hustle and bustle of adulting. That’s true for me at least. For many years, my happy place has been Buck’s Rock Performing and Creative Arts Camp, a sleep-away camp that I spent six summers during my t(w)eenage years. There are many special things about Buck’s Rock but the one thing that I cherished the most growing up was the culture of acceptance no matter our differences deeply instilled by the founders in the 1940s. Ernst and Ilsa Bulova, Austrian educators and refugees from Nazi Germany, imagined a place where children could exercise their independence and discover who they truly are as humans. For me, Buck’s Rock was exactly that.

Fast forward about three decades. As a mother to three children, I longed for the prospect of introducing my happy place to the family. They were granted that opportunity and became Buck’s Rock campers the summer of 2022.

Many of you have read various posts about my family’s affiliation with the rare disease community with the Duchenne muscular dystrophy diagnosis of Caffrey, our 14-year-old son. Caffrey was eleven when he started at Buck’s Rock. At the time, he was not the most athletic kid, but was still ambulatory, able to climb steps, and pretty much got around independently. Uneven paths, tree roots galore, and steps leading into most buildings, I struggled to imagine how Caffrey might be able to continue his experience at Buck’s Rock as his condition progressed. Nestled in the woods of New Milford, Connecticut, Buck’s Rock was hardly designed for kids with disabilities. I dreaded the day that we would need to have a tough conversation with Caffrey saying his siblings would return for another summer, but that Buck’s Rock was no longer suitable for a kid like him.?

Instead, we had a tough conversation with Buck’s Rock and the reality was that it was not very tough at all. What could have gone something like, ‘we understand our camp is not for everyone; Caffrey will be missed’ was more like ‘we would love Caffrey to continue to enjoy Buck’s Rock. Help us understand what we need to do to make it more accommodating.’?

The current leadership of Buck’s Rock converted the camp to a not-for-profit organization in 2021 with a dream to make the camp much more affordable and accessible to a far more diverse group of campers. Addressing Caffrey’s needs was welcomed as an opportunity for them to accelerate that ambition and embrace individuals with disabilities.?

Last summer we had to DIY a ramp ourselves to help Caffrey more easily access the camp’s dining hall (a project that appeared on an episode of This Old House during our recent home remodel.) That was a stop gap at the time since Caffrey’s abilities were mostly stable. However, following two femur fractures in the last year, Caffrey lost the ability to climb stairs completely. Buck’s Rock stepped up and made dramatic improvements across campus. The dining hall, one of the original iconic structures on camp, was completely reconfigured where the main entrance and exit that is used by all is a ramp that meets Americans with Disabilities Act guidance. In doing so, Caffrey is no longer ‘othered’ in how he accesses the building by using a side or back door and the new entryways create a better flow for diners to collect their meals. It was a major change inspired by accessibility, but it made the experience better for everyone.

Buck’s Rock is not just making progress for kids with a physical disability. There is a dedicated Access and Equity Manager on staff, and they are working hard to diversify their accessible offerings including a Zoom-room where people can stay in touch with their mental health support team and sensory-friendly adjustments for neurodivergent individuals. All these changes are building a more inclusive and dynamic camp environment. In a world where diversity in all its forms is gradually being celebrated, understanding and integrating the needs of those with disabilities is a crucial step towards fostering a culture of true inclusivity.?

Slowly but surely, my happy place is becoming accessible. Will Buck’s Rock become Caffrey’s happy place? That’s up to him, but it’s hard to imagine any place that is not accessible could be elevated to that level for anyone with a disability. But our happy places can’t just become accessible on their own. It takes genuine commitment and an investment of energy and capital. We all should do our part to make our happy places even happier.?

In honor of July being Disability Pride Month, please consider donating to Buck’s Rock by clicking here or purchasing an item from their accommodations wish list to support greater accessibility for one of the world’s best happy places. I thank you. And Caffrey thanks you.?