10 Key Choices That Lead to Happiness

Happiness is a personal choice that we all strive for. Happiness is based on our happenings, not on our circumstances. Research shows that much of our happiness is linked to the small choices we make every day.

Now, you may ask, "What about the choices that create unhappiness?" It's essential to practice some retrospection about unfavorable behaviors and make any necessary changes to achieve more happiness because, if left "unchecked," these unfavorable behaviors can eventually turn our lives from better to bitter.?

Fortunately, it's never too late to let go of what doesn't make us happy. We must remember that it's the small choices that impact our happiness day after day.

It's also essential to be clear about what we believe in, value, and stand for to make good choices that lead us to live a happy life that aligns with who we are. While it's a human need to want to please others, be liked, be recognized, and so on, we don't have to depend on these behaviors to feel happy.

Following is a guide to help us choose to let go of unfavorable behaviors to make room for favorable ones that create happiness:

1. Choose to let go of "The need to constantly please others."

The saddest part of "needing to please others" is the never-ending sacrifices we'll have to make that will never be enough to accomplish this unrealistic task. As a result, we'll feel discouraged and resentful. Instead, we benefit from being more empathic with ourselves.

"In trying to please all, he had pleased none." Aesop

2. Choose to let go of "The need to constantly to say yes."

Saying "yes" to others is easier than saying "no," even if it makes us uncomfortable. Be it out of obligation or out of the fear of rejection, we often say "yes" in an automated way. Instead, we need to be honest and considerate with ourselves.

"The oldest, shortest words - 'yes' and 'no' - are those which require the most thought." Pythagoras

3. Choose to let go of "The need to constantly get approval/validation."

Basing our self-esteem or identity on what others say and approve of us is like riding a roller coaster of emotions. It's a hard job to depend on others for approval and validation so we can feel better about ourselves. Instead, we benefit from knowing we are competent and good enough.

"A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval." Mark Twain

4. Choose to let go of "The need to constantly be respected."

Most people will respect us if we respect them; it's all about applying the Golden Rule. However, it is impossible to get everyone's respect; even if we try tirelessly, we'll be unsuccessful. Instead, we must respect ourselves regardless of what others do or do not.

"Respect for ourselves guides our morals; respect for others guides our manners." Laurence Sterne

5. Choose to let go of "The need to constantly be liked."

We weren't born to be liked by everyone, nor born to like every one; that's a universal truth. We will be immensely unhappy if we live in a state of "needing others to like us." Instead, we benefit from being true to ourselves and genuinely liking ourselves

"If you just set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything at any time, and you would achieve nothing." Margaret Thatcher

6. Choose to let go of "The need to be constantly be accepted."

Our progress and success in life are interrupted when we seek the acceptance of others. Our world won't fall apart if everyone doesn't accept us; it's okay if they don't. Instead, we need first to be ourselves and compassionately accept ourselves.

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." Ralph Waldo Emerson

7. Choose to let go of "The need to constantly be recognized."

Our struggle to get recognition can cost us valuable time and deplete our energy to move forward. Our lives aren't based on the recognition we receive for our contributions and accomplishments. Instead, we benefit from reflecting on our growth and values.

"Don't worry when you are not recognized, but strive to be worthy of recognition." Abraham Lincoln

8. Choose to let go of "The need to constantly worry about what others think."

Investing our time and energy worrying about others' opinions about us can be debilitating and stressful. What others think or say about us is beyond our control, no matter what we say or do. Instead, we need to focus on what matters most to us.

"You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do." Eleanor Roosevelt

9. Choose to let go of "The need to constantly prove your worth."

We may waste valuable time proving our worth to others who may not really care. People will acknowledge our worth if they choose to; it's not by force; it's by choice. Instead, we benefit from appreciating and valuing ourselves.

"If you find yourself constantly trying to prove your worth to someone, you have already forgotten your value." Unknown

10. Choose to let go of "The need constantly to fit in."

We all struggle with the unusual and the unknown, so we're naturally drawn to what's familiar. We long to belong, even if it means acting differently by mirroring others' behaviors. Instead, we need to embrace our differences and realize we're unique.

"Why fit in when you were born to stand out?" Dr. Seuss

Please?join the conversation?by sharing your thoughts about the ten choices listed above, Which one speaks the most to you? Thank You! @IvetteKCM

Other Articles by Ivette K. Caballero

Why Character Matters: "It Makes You or It Breaks You."

Growing Through Life: How Gratitude Makes Us Thrive

Self-Confidence: The Path to a Greater You