YOUR DARK PLACE
Our personal stories can be powerful and poignant. Some can be painful, coming from a place of deep pain and raw emotions…THE DARK PLACE.
My friend Craig Valentine says, “A message is a MESS with AGE” and Legendary comedienne Carol Burnett said, “Comedy?is PAIN plus TIME.”
‘AGE’ and the ‘TIME’ may come too quickly.?Let me clarify.
Zealous to move our audience, we may use a story from our DARK PLACE without giving ourselves enough?time to heal.
Although well-intentioned, we can re-open a wound and resurrect painful memories.
For some, going to the dark place brings healing, but we have to be doubly sure that we won’t harm ourselves. We have?to make sure that we can ‘find our way back.’
I saw this first-hand at the 2010 World Championship of Public Speaking. Champion David Henderson took the audience on an emotional journey that was at times painful.
Telling his story stirred his own emotions, and tears streaked his face.
He didn’t shed tears to tug at the audience’s heart strings or manipulate them.
His emotions were genuine, appropriate and understandable in the context of his presentation.
Most importantly, David was fully in control.
At no time did it seem that he was seeking redemption, forgiveness, sympathy or validation from the audience.
Nor did it appear that he was looking for answers, searching for a way to rid himself of any guilt, or appealing for comfort and consolation.
He didn’t need to heed this advice from my friend and fellow professional speaker Ed Tate:
“Don’t use the platform for therapy!”
We must protect ourselves.
We must also consider the potential impact on our AUDIENCE.
领英推荐
Here’s David’s advice: “If you go to the dark place and leave the audience there, they will likely hold it against you.”
Ironically, the more successful we are at visiting the dark place, the greater our risk of offending our audience.
If going to the dark place too soon can throw our emotions into a tailspin, imagine what it might do to audience members!?
Our stories should elicit emotion; not rip into emotions.
Our experiences are certainly vast enough to touch our audiences without causing emotional turmoil.
When we present, we wield the power to mold and manipulate our audience’s emotions. That’s a tremendous responsibility.
We needn’t go to the DARK PLACE to speak with power and impact.
Here’s my ask.
BE BRUTALLY HONEST WITH YOURSELF. If going to the dark place is painful…don’t go.
Please don’t leave the audience feeling LOW.
If you are confident that going to THE DARK PLACE won’t harm you, and will help your audience, feel free to take the audience with you.
Just be sure that you can find your way back from YOUR DARK PLACE.
====================================================
To learn how I can help you to master presentation techniques, check out the UNFORGETTABLE PRESENTATIONS PODCAST where my co-host Darren LaCroix, CSP, AS, WCPS and I discuss all things speaking and interview some of the best in the business of speaking.
?
CEO, Sports & Entertainment Consultation Services, LLC
1 年Join us to craft your leadership and communication skills.
Stay Out in Front?! Providing Powerful Competitive Intelligence to Executives Making Critical Decisions | Servicing CEOs, CSOs, CMOs, Brand Managers & CI Leaders | Keynote Speaker and Workshop Facilitator | CI Fellow
1 年Thanks for sharing this guidance, Mark! I hadn't really considered it before but will now! I'm going have to search to see if David Henderson's winning speech is posted somewhere. Curious to hear it.
Professional Speaker ★ Helping Healthcare Professionals ★ To Be A Success ★
1 年Going to a dark place brings healing, but we have?to make sure that we can ‘find our way back.’ of the dark forest—a place that some of us may fear, yet for others, it holds the promise of healing and growth. I think we all carry some burdens, hidden in the recesses of our minds like shadows within the dense woods. It takes bravery to venture into this forest. When we go into the depths of our emotions and memories, we must remember to bring along with us a guiding light and a compass that brings us back to safety. This compass represents our inner strength, the support of loved ones, and the wisdom of seeking professional help when needed. And with the guiding light, we can navigate the surroundings of the dark forest, find our way back, and emerge stronger than before. Every time we step we take into the darkness, it requires self-compassion and self-awareness. As we confront our fears and insecurities, we must be gentle with ourselves, understanding that healing is not an overnight journey but a continuous process.
Iconic and Off-The-Beaten Track - On The Spirit Road: Active Travel to Understand Yourself | Share With Others | Private Groups for Meaningful Community | Local | Slow | Wellness (Read Bio For More)
1 年Really good advice, Mark Brown, CSP Speaking is about serving the audience and not "ripping the audience". It sounds like David Henderson was adept at sharing emotionally with Take Away for the audience. Are there other speakers and or any specific talk you might share when this is done so well?