Are you writing a self-help book or a memoir?
Ginny Carter
Bestselling Ghostwriter of over 25 books that are putting their authors in the spotlight | Business, self-help, memoir | Award-winning author of two book writing guides
As a ghostwriter and book coach, I work with many people who’ve been through a major struggle in their lives. After they’ve come out the other end, they feel inspired to write a self-help book or memoir about it.
Some even decide to become coaches or therapists so they can help others with the same problem. They see their book as being not only a way of helping people, but also a booster for their professional credibility and authority.
So far, so good. But here’s where many would-be authors get stuck.
They’re not sure whether they’re writing a?self-help guide?or a?memoir. And because they’re not clear, they run the risk of their book falling between two stools, confusing their readers and not giving them the outcome they want.
If this is the position you’re in, you might be asking what the difference is between the two, and why it matters.
That’s a fair question, and it depends on two things: what you intend for your book to achieve, and what your readers expect to get out of it.
Here’s how to decide which camp your book falls into.
What’s your aim?
If your primary aim is to help people achieve a personal transformation in their lives, it’s a self-help book you’re writing, not a memoir. In this, you take your readers on a journey from problem to solution by sharing your expertise and making teaching points as you go along. Your personal story will be included, but it?won’t?be the main focus of the book.
An example of a self-help book is Gretchen Rubin’s?The Happiness Project. In it, the author shares her knowledge about how to create a happier life. And while the author makes plentiful use of her own story throughout, it’s secondary to the teaching points within it.
However, if your primary aim is to entertain and inspire your readers by recounting your personal experiences, it’s a memoir, not a self-help book. In a memoir you tell the story that led to your personal transformation. The difference between this and a self-help book is that you don’t make any explicit teaching points.
An example of a memoir is Maggie O’Farrell’s?I Am, I Am, I Am. In this, the author recounts her various close encounters with death throughout her life. Her aim is to help both herself and her daughter, who suffers from life-threatening allergies, to accept the constant proximity of death.
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Your readers’ expectations
There’s also a difference in readers’ expectations between the two types of book.
In a memoir your readers primarily expect to be moved and entertained, as Elizabeth Gilbert achieves in?Eat, Pray, Love, for instance. It’s a story about the author’s travels abroad and her journey of personal growth, but she doesn’t make any overt points about what her readers can learn. It’s up to them how inspired they want to feel to make changes to their own lives as a result of reading it.
In a self-help guide, on the other hand, your readers expect to learn specific things that they can apply. They want exercises, instructions, and direct teaching, not just a lovely story.
You need to decide
‘But I want to do both,’ you say. ‘I’ve had life experiences which have been transformational for me and which have led to the client work I carry out today. I want my readers to learn from my expertise, but I also need to talk about my own story so they can see where I’m coming from.’
That’s fantastic, but you need to decide which is most important. Is your book a teaching guide or a memoir? Because if you try to achieve both equally, you won’t be successful at either.
Readers won’t know what to expect from it (which is the kiss of death for your sales) and bookstores won’t know what shelf to put it on: memoir or self-help. Even more importantly, it won’t be clear to those who do read it what they’re supposed to get out of it. Are they meant to learn from your teaching points or from your story?
In other words, do they expect to be taught or to teach themselves?
If you decide that you want primarily to inspire your readers through your story, it’s a memoir you’re writing. And if you decide that you want primarily to teach your readers explicitly, it’s a self-help guide you’re writing.
Of course, a self-help book should still contain lots of stories and examples from your personal experience – the more the merrier. But these will be?incidental?to the lessons and how-tos that make up the ‘meat’ of your book. If you’d like to read a personal development book that achieves this well,?Option B?by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant is a sound choice, as is?The Long Win?by Cath Bishop.
To summarise: do you want your readers to learn specific lessons and put them into practice in their lives? If so, you’re writing a self-help book. Or, do you want to entertain and inspire your readers with your personal story? If so, you’re writing a memoir.
Decide now which it is, and go for it.
This post originally appeared on?Ginny Carter's blog.