Are you a worry warrior?

It’s amazing how much time and energy we spend worrying about things that won’t matter in 10 days, let alone 10 years.

We live in a world where we have been taught to be everything for everyone, and we often end up in a constant state of stress. We have become addicted to stress; in the absence of it, we worry about unimportant things, which leads to more of it.

What decisions and issues are you currently agonizing over? Will they matter in a week, a year, or a decade? If not, let it go and relax. Chances are, whatever you decide will work out just fine. If the decision does have lasting consequences, worrying and stressing most certainly won’t lead to a better decision, it will just suck the emotional energy right out of you.

Easier said than done though, right? Thankfully, there are a lot of science-based and research-backed ways to fight back next time you feel worry taking over your mind.

I have been a chronic worrier all of my life, and while there are no easy fixes, here are a few of my go-tos:

Identify the thoughts causing you to worry

Usually there is a distorted thought in there somewhere like, "I’ll never be able to handle that" or "Why does this always happen to me?", or "What if…". Challenge these thoughts and ask yourself:

· Is it true?

· What’s the chance of that really happening?

· Is the thought helping me?

· Is there a better way to look at it?

Create a worry window

It’s not realistic to get rid of worry altogether, so give yourself permission to do it at specific times throughout the day. I give myself some time in the morning and evening to process all of the things I’m worried about. If I find myself worrying outside of that time, I write it down and give myself permission to think about it later.

Half the time what I’m worried about has resolved itself or doesn’t seem like as big of a deal once some time has passed. I also challenge myself to think of something I’m grateful for to interrupt the worry cycle. It puts things in perspective.

Practice mindfulness

Whether it is in this time of global crisis or our normal hectic lives, life has become increasingly complicated. Proactively build your mental health and resilience by practicing mindfulness. Mindfulness helps you become aware of your thoughts, feelings, habits, and behaviors in the moment, in order to steer yourself toward better responses and outcomes. Practicing mindfulness restores your connection to the present moment and empowers you to get beyond the moments that urgently trigger your brain to react.

Thoughts and emotions change rapidly, so just observe the worry and watch it float by. A quick way to bring yourself back to the present is to stop what you’re doing and identify 10 details in the room you’re in. So simple, yet so powerful to bring yourself back to center.

Create a personal mantra

Personal mantras are a powerful meditation and therapy tool. Neuroscientists are beginning to quantify and confirm some of the health benefits of this practice, such as its ability to help free your mind and calm your nervous system. So when you notice yourself worrying, repeat your personal mantra. When we talk to ourselves, it's easy to go back to what we have habitually said. It takes practice to send ourselves new, more productive messages.

When I started my own business, I was a single mother raising a child with severe mental illness and I was exhausted. One of my favorite mantras at that time was, "All I can do is all I can do."

Move your body

Exercise is not something I gravitate toward naturally. I can find all kinds of great excuses for not exercising, but I have had to make it a non-negotiable. Getting outside and breaking a sweat each day keeps me sane. Exercise also helps mental health. It allows your brain to repair neurons damaged by worry and stress, lowers the risk of Alzheimer’s, dementia, and heart disease, produces changes in the parts of the brain that regulate stress and anxiety, and the list goes on.

It creates the good stuff your brain needs when you are in a constant state of uncertainty. Just 10 minutes a day builds health, strength, and resilience.

Unfortunately, we create so much of our own stress and misery. Most of the internal worry chatter is not only useless, but unhealthy. We were not meant to be worry warriors.