YOU WON’T DIE IF YOU APOLOGIZE
Agnes Onyekwere
Social Entrepreneur l CEO-Project MEND l Humanitarian Of Africa 2024 Award Winner??l Award Winning Educator (TRCN Certified)l Certified Project Manager l Author of “Dear Eunice”l Alumna of Teach for Nigeria
I was recently on a long road trip where our driver almost knocked down an Okada guy, and the guy didn’t want to let go because our driver rained insults on him, asking if he didn’t hear him honk. The guy got angry and went to wait for us in front of a hold-up, where he called other bike riders to charge at our driver, who refused to come out of the car as they asked. They ended up trying to drag him out and beating him up seriously until he was profusely bleeding. He also used a metallic cup to injure the people forcing him out. He fiercely fought back, so both parties were injured.?
Our trip had to stop at that point because our driver had to go to the hospital, and the incident had to be reported to the nearest police station. So we waited for all these to happen, and after 6 long hours, the driver returned with very huge stitches on his face, with a bloody eye and swollen face. We later heard that the guy who started the fight had been detained at the police station and won’t be released until further notice.
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One huge lesson from all of this for me was how far a little “sorry” would have gone to avoid all these. If the driver had just forgotten about his ego and just apologized, he wouldn’t have deep injuries on his face, wasted our 6 hours on the road, and wasted almost 100 thousand he spent trying to get a lawyer. On the other hand, the guy who started the fight would have just forgiven and moved on, but no, he wanted to show the man “who he was”. But then at the end of the day, he is detained at the police station, he lost his right to movement, with the possibility of losing more rights or paying huge damages if the court rules against him. Now, this was someone who was supposed to just shake his head and thank God he eventually wasn’t hit and move on with all he had to do that day.
The plight of the cyclist and the huge stitches on the face of our driver served as a reminder that whether I choose forgiveness and progression, or acknowledge my correctness yet still extend an apology, I am sparing myself a great deal of unnecessary stress, pain, or loss.