Are you suuurrre your emails aren't offending anyone?

My friend, Jack Appleman, author of the best-selling book, 10 Steps to Successful Business Writing, recently published an article in OfficePro Magazine, and I thought it provided some great tips so I'm sharing it with you. 

As Jack points out, "When you speak, it’s fairly easy to control your tone. Whether you’re happy, excited, frustrated or panicked, your mood comes across loud and clear... it's a different story when you write."

We've all heard that, to keep us from firing off an angry email, we should write and save it in the drafts folder until we've cooled off. Or we should have someone else read it to ensure it's professional. 

But, what about when you send off a regular ol' innocent email, only to have a co-worker later appear in your office to ask you what's wrong? Looking back on the email, you don't understand why the co-worker took your email to mean something was wrong. You weren't angry or upset when you sent it, after all.

I know I've sent off a few emails like this.

You may have heard that 93% of your message is nonverbal and the words are only 7%. That means in an email, where all you have are the words - just 7% of your message is being conveyed. So you have to craft those words carefully!

(The 93% is broken down into two types of nonverbal communication: body language, which is 55% of your message, and paralinguistics, the other 38%. Body language refers to your posture, eye contact, gestures, clothes and even the way you smell. Paralinguistics is all of the "stuff" that goes along with your words such as tone, volume, pace, and pitch.)

Here's an example of an email gone awry from Jack's article: 

What you wrote: Your budget report was confusing.

What you communicated: You’re an idiot! You don’t know how to write a coherent budget report.

Wait, all you wrote was, "Your budget report was confusing." How does that convey you think someone is an idiot? 

The answer is the word, "your." Starting things off with "you" or "your" immediately ignites defensiveness in the reader. He or she can't help it, it just does.

Instead, Jack suggests trying, "Please clarify a few points about your budget report." This eliminates the chance for defensiveness, and if you ask specific questions immediately after this statement, the issue can be resolved.

You may even try walking over to your co-worker to discuss it in person! Of course, you'll avoid using "your" and instead say, "I didn't understand a few things in your report. Do you have time to review them with me?"

Check out Jack's article for more tips on writing emails.

Sincerely,

Catherine