Are you subconsciously making life & business harder than it needs to be? Know the signs

Ever feel like you’re wading through treacle? Where no matter what you do, life seems unnecessarily complicated? It’s a fact, that sometimes, we subconsciously make things harder than they need to be.

You’re a managing director, an entrepreneur, a decision-maker. You know how to handle a P&L, lead teams, and drive results. But what about when it comes to leading yourself?

The truth is, the biggest obstacle to success isn’t always the economy, the market, or the people around you. Sometimes, it’s the way you think. And that, my friend, is something you can control.

Are you subconsciously holding yourself back?

I see it all the time—brilliant, capable leaders unintentionally making their own lives more difficult. How? Here are some of the most common offenders:

Blaming others (or circumstances) instead of taking control

Life throws curveballs. Staff leave, clients ghost you, suppliers mess up, and yes—sometimes, traffic makes you late. The easy (but unhelpful) thing to do is blame external factors. The problem? It achieves nothing—except making you feel worse and handing over your power to what you can’t control. Instead, focus on what you can control and take responsibility for that

Not accepting where you are right now

If you’re in a sticky situation, or not where you want to be, wishing things were different won’t change it. Accepting reality doesn’t mean you like it—it means you acknowledge it, and when we acknowledge there’s a problem, we can change it. The quicker you do this, the quicker you can move forward.

Holding onto imaginary expectations

Ever built something up in your head, only to be crushed when reality didn’t or doesn’t match? Whether it’s a business deal, a new hire, or purchasing something special before you tried it out (don’t ask ha ha), sometimes we can build an image in our head of what we want it to be and ignore what it actually is. Success isn’t about things always going to plan—it’s about adapting when they don’t.

Catastrophising like it’s an Olympic sport

Your brain has the capacity to be brilliant at convincing you, through a buried belief,? that disaster is imminent. That the project or business will fail. You’ll lose everything. You’ll be living under a bridge, fashioning WiFi from tin foil just to check LinkedIn. Sound familiar? Here’s the truth: most of the things we worry about never happen. It's a huge waste of time and energy. Catch yourself, ask: “What’s the actual likelihood of this?” And then get on with being brilliant, and focusing on making what you’re working on a success

Clinging to old habits that no longer serve you

Just because you’ve always done something a certain way doesn’t mean it’s STILL the best way. Maybe you’ve been leading the same way for years, or taking on work that should be delegated. Maybe you’re still cleaning your own house when you could be focusing on bigger things. Ask yourself: Is this habit serving me, or just keeping me stuck?

Choosing to think negatively

Ever notice how when you wake up expecting a terrible day, you usually get one? That’s because your brain is wired to find evidence for whatever you believe and focus on. Flip the script. Start actively looking for the positives, and watch how much easier life (and leadership) becomes.

How coaching can help you master this

Being a leader means making decisions—big ones, daily. But if your mindset is stuck (you're human after all!) in self-sabotage, doubt, or unnecessary complexity, you’ll hold yourself, your team (and your business) back. Coaching helps you see these blind spots, shift your perspective, and start making decisions that move you forward with confidence.

So, if you’re resonating with this article and suspect that perhaps you are falling into one or more of these downward spirals, want to stop, and are ready to rise to your full potential—let’s talk.