Are you sick and tired of your job? Do you need to do something completely different? Maybe it’s time to Reinvent yourself. Here’s how to do it

By Jack J. Kelly

Call me crazy, but I don’t believe that humans were programmed and wired to spend eight to twelve hours a day– day after day, after day, month after month, year after year, after year– sitting in an uncomfortable chair, staring at a computer under harsh fluorescent lights in a soul-sucking office, in a crowded and cold city.

An alarm clock or phone’s jarring wake-up call at 6:00 am leads to a long commute into a foreboding city on an overcrowded subway, bus, or highway. If you are trapped inside a train or bus, of course, you are squished between the two people sneezing and coughing and inhaling all their germs. You think to yourself, “Why won’t he just take a damn cough drop and how come she has to sneeze in her hands and study the end result before wiping it on the seat?”

Once you arrive into the city, you are pushed, shoved and jostled by a mob of surly people who did not have their coffee yet. Scary homeless people who clearly need medical and emotional assistance accost you for money. You’d like to offer some, but afraid to go near them due to the chance of random, physical violence or being subjected to an incoherent outburst of rage. Once outside the train station, a speeding Uber driver careens through a massive puddle drenching you with a shower of dirty street water.

You finally arrive at the office. The security guard asks for ID, even though you see him every single day for the last 10 years. A guy closes the elevator door when he sees you, instead of holding it open. You smile and nod to the front receptionist, who promptly ignores you. And the day only goes downhill from there.

There comes a time in a person’s professional life when he starts to think, “Is this who I am and will be for the 10, 20 or 30 years?” She or he has reached a place where, although earning a good living, feels unfulfilled, dissatisfied, and somewhat sad. She starts to get scared that she is stuck in a rut that will never change. There is a lack of meaning and purpose to her work and there is a pull to do something more satisfying with her life.

As a recruiter, professionals will often ask “How can I pivot from what I am doing to X” (They don’t really say ‘X’, that’s just a placeholder for what they would prefer to do instead of what they are currently doing, which I guess should be Y. It’s like a math equation). A hedge fund lawyer may tell me that after representing multi-millionaire and billionaire big ego blowhard money managers, they have to do something else. The attorney may earn between 300k and one million dollars per year (not too shabby). Despite the comfortable compensation, he feels unhappy, frustrated, and desperately needing a change. Yes, I know, you are not going to cry for the guy or hold a charity for him. I get it. Boo-hoo, it’s a high class problem to have. This occurs up and down the food chain. Someone who is earning $60k and desires a change will be envied and quested by the person making minimum wage, while he frantically tries to support his family. The multi-millionaire athlete wants to become a rapper. The rapper wants to be an actor. The actor has to be a politician. It’s the human condition. We were not designed to do the same thing, year after year and year for 40+ years.

Some people suck it up and keep doing a job that they have grown to hate. They go through the motions like a robot. Each day, they get a little more bitter, disappointed, and disaffected. They become short-tempered, nasty, and sarcastic, and devoid of feelings. Even though they can do their job with their eyes closed, they come home at night, sink into the coach, and are exhausted.

Others feel that they are becoming a person that they don’t like and need to do something, anything different. This is the time when a person decides to reinvent themselves. Reinventing yourself is starting anew; leaving you former frustrating life to pursue a fresh, new, and exciting chapter. It’s not easy. You will have to walk away from a career, which is your identity, lose the social status of your high-end job, and have your family and friends look at you quizzically, as if you are in the midst of a midlife crisis.

If you find yourself in the place where you desperately need to change and reinvent yourself, allow me to offer some suggestions of how to start.

• Figure out what you want to do next and then come up with an in-depth game plan. You don’t want to jump headfirst into becoming a stand-up comedian, business owner, or rock star. Plan out how you can go from being a Stock Broker to a teacher. How long will it take? Do you have the money to carry you through the change period? Is your spouse behind you? Can you economically afford the loss of income? Can you mentally and emotionally handle the change?

• If possible, start the process while you are still in your current job. It will serve to lessen the stress and anxiety associated with the process. The extra time will provide you with a longer runway to take off into the new venture.

• If you have lost your job, the conservative approach would be to interview for another job while still planning your reinvention. You could also say screw-it, burn all the bridges behind you, and aggressively seek out the new change and challenge.

• Research your new career, job, or business idea to make sure that you can earn a reasonable living that you and your family will be comfortable with.

• Be prepared for sleepless nights, anxiety and worries. It comes with the territory.

• Speak to people who are doing what you want to do and get their input and opinions. These folks could help you determine if you are making the right decision and offer some advice and guidance.

• Put money away in advance of the reinvention decision. This should have been number 1 but I didn’t think of it until now, and I am too lazy to go back and change everything.

• You have to change you. It is important to come to the resolution that you are starting from scratch. It’s hard to do. I know you were a top-dog at your company, sitting in a big cushy office, and making a nice living. It’s hard to walk away and begin all over again. You’re now the bottom rung of the ladder. Your pride will take a huge hit. Your neighbors will whisper behind your back. Your former colleagues will forget you. You’ll think that they’ll be there, but they won’t. You are a ghost to them. You’re not part of the gang any longer.

• Seek a mentor to serve as your personal Yoda. If you can’t find a guru, read lots of books about people who have succeeded in the field you are entering to learn from them.

• Take itty-bitty steps at first toward the direction.

• Give yourself a time-frame to achieve the goal. It could take a long time. The first few years, you may not be making any money at all. You may just eke out a meager existence. Then, hopefully things start to kick-in.

• You may have to throw in the towel and reinvent yourself yet again.

• Put in the hours that you need to succeed. In fact, put more than the hours needed. Since you are older, and competing from square one, you need to put in as much time as humanly possible to catch-up, and then accelerate ahead.

• You may have to give up free time, family, and friends to do all this reinvention work.

• Enjoy the journey. You only live once, so you might as well try to be happy.

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