You Are Seen

Suicide is the taking, or ending, of one’s own life. This can be done in a variety of ways and for a variety of reasons. Much like death, suicide does not have a strict code to adhere to. It can happen upon anyone at any time and for any reason. The only variation between death and suicide is that suicide is a choice. When people feel helpless and hopeless, and they feel like they have no control over their world around them, they turn to the one thing they have control over. They have control over their own body, whether to breath or not, whether to live or die. Suicide is a solid foundation for persons standing in quicksand.

In Western culture, suicide is considered shameful and something that must remain hidden or concealed. Americans tend to be too proud to admit that a loved one has committed suicide. Authority figures use terminology that would not indicate suicide, such as ‘death by asphyxiation’ or ‘death by gunshot’. They often do not record that it was, in fact, a suicide. To get an accurate accounting of how many suicides are occurring in the United States every year, the reports would need to reflect not only cause of death but also means of death; whether homicide, suicide, or murder-suicide. There is a suicide every thirteen minutes in the United States.

In any event, the United States sees more successful suicides among Caucasian men than any other race or sex. Some of the main causes for suicide include financial hardships, health problems, relationship issues, and mental disorders. The military see a high rate of suicide due to PTSD, a mental disorder. There is a downward spiral for one who has served in the military. They may develop PTSD, become financially broken, end up homeless and alone, and eventually end their life. The United States has very little resources to make sure our soldiers do not end up another statistic.

The Japanese view suicide as honorable. The act of harakiri, or seppuku, is a ritual wherein one disembowels oneself by piercing their abdomen with a sword and cutting in a horizontal path. Much like America, Japanese suicides are usually male and are fueled by financial troubles, mental disorders, and social pressures. Japan sees an average of seventy people committing suicide daily.

In terms of religion, Christianity states that suicide is a mortal sin. If one were to commit suicide, they would not be allowed into the Kingdom of Heaven. Catholicism believes that suicide goes against the fifth commandment which states “thou shalt not kill”. Other religious sects such as Hinduism, Jainism, Buddhism, Islam, and Judaism practice the same teachings as Christianity. Suicide is prohibited in these religions and will not be justified or forgiven.

Let us take a look at some reasons for suicides. An eight-year-old girl is being bullied at school. No one likes her and she has to play and eat her lunch alone. The other children whisper things about her hair and clothes, how dirty she is. Her home life consists of an alcoholic father, a depressed mother, and a sixteen-year-old brother. Tragedy can strike any age, gender, or race. One day, the father drinks himself into an alcoholic depression and decides to shoot himself in the head. Big brother is in his bedroom ‘playing’ the new ‘game’ he saw on YouTube where you make yourself pass out to get a high. He usually comes to, but this time, he was not so lucky. The bullied little girl, finally having enough, hangs herself in the bathtub. The mother, grief-stricken, downs a bottle of prescription pills.

Statistically men are more likely to commit suicide in a very direct manner. They tend to use firearms. Further, men are more likely to shoot themselves in the head. Women, on the other hand, tend to avoid firearms as a means of suicide. They often choose knives or medications/drugs. Interestingly, if a woman were to use a firearm, she would most likely shoot herself in the heart rather than the head. It is believed that a woman’s inner vanity is what controls this decision. Children, whether male or female, are more likely to use strangulation/suffocation or medication/drugs to commit suicide. Children are also more likely to commit accidental suicide by playing dangerous games. Adults may also commit accidental suicide by being voyeuristic. Strangulation is a high that some find exhilarating. They put themselves in harm’s way when they attempt to get themselves to the brink of asphyxiation without going too far so as to strangle themselves.

Further, men use lethal means of suicide in order to be successful. By choosing to take a large amount of drugs or slitting wrists, women increase their chance of surviving the suicide attempt. More often than not, women do not want to complete the suicide. This is their cry for help when they are feeling helpless, alone, and unloved. They do something dramatic/drastic in an attempt to trigger a reaction in someone. Children tend to do the same as women in these cases. They want their plea to be heard and action to be taken so that their lives are spared and ultimately repaired to a state of happiness. These people have, most likely, talked about committing suicide or have made comments to others about suicide. Persons who truly wish to take their lives do not discuss the possibility of them committing suicide. They do not make a spectacle of the situation. They slip away quietly somewhere, only to be found later, after they have passed.

There are intentional, accidental, and attempted suicides. These are non-biased. In most cultures, suicide is not praised or even acknowledged. It is condemned. There are words we find that we do not want to talk about or hear: suicide, abortion, rape, molestation, addiction. These words are swept under rugs so that no one has to encounter them. These are real, they never go away, they must be talked about.

Suicide is that little piece of lint in the pocket of your jeans. It is there, silently sitting. You pay it no attention; you do not even know it is there. Sometimes when you are feeling down, you put your hand inside your pocket and something tickles your fingertips. You pull out the lint, take a look at it, and brush it out of your hand. Silly piece of lint. Somehow it finds its way back into your pocket waiting for you to discover it once again. Most of us look at the lint and shake it off, but some of us stare at the lint so intently that we become consumed with it and it is all we can focus on. Background noise ceases, thoughts fade away, and all there is is that little piece of lint. The quiet solitude in that moment is when you make your choice. Will you cast the thought aside or will you become the thought?