Are You Running at the Right Pace?

Our family took a “twilight nature hike” on a trip last year. What could have lasted 15 minutes lasted two hours due to the pace of the guide. “Please stay behind me,” he calmly repeated as we slowly proceeded through the complete darkness. Over and over again, he’d thoughtfully respond to a question or quietly shine his flashlight through a telescopic lens, revealing a beautiful insect or sleeping bird.

I found myself becoming impatient at first. But then I decided to make an effort to calm myself to appreciate the hike. Soon enough, I was realizing how much I would have completely missed had I gotten through this hike in just 15 minutes.

I wondered how this might be a metaphor for life — how I tend to run too quickly through life.

This experience has prompted me to contemplate the following three questions about the pace you and I are running:

1.? What might we see if we paused and slowed down? The Dutch are known for practicing the art of Niksen, which is “not doing anything” to increase happiness and productivity. Research suggests that doing nothing leads to higher levels of creativity as your mind makes connections, realizations and observations. You pay more attention to stirrings, memories, hunches, hints and hidden realities.

You also might see people and opportunities more clearly. For example, I had a meaningful conversation with a colleague last week in our office. The connection only happened because we both paused our busy days to talk for a few minutes on a meaningful level. We engaged in what David Brooks calls “the art of seeing others deeply and being deeply seen.”

2. Whose pace are we following? Although I am a competitive person, I never thought I’d try to “keep up with the Joneses” in my life. Yet I admit to wondering whether I’m getting ahead or falling behind. It’s probably a consequence of years of academic rankings, sports scoreboards and corporate reviews and hierarchy.

Speed and accomplishment are not just rewarded societally. There’s a relational side to this too. It feels good to be a hero or helper for others. We rush to respond, to fix, to handle it and to not disappoint people. While this can be well-intentioned, it can also create an endless hectic string of fast-paced obligations.

3. How can we better manage our pace? Here are some quick ideas to consider:

• Park the technology. Tech is awesome, though it can create distractions and promote scanning. Put your device(s) away every day for a while and pick up a pen and paper or a book, or just look out the window.
• Schedule time to do nothing. Scheduling time for yourself is a keystone habit — a habit that drives other habits. Regardless of the demands on your life, everyone should make daily appointments with themselves.
• Get a new view. Go for a hike, work in a different location or change up your routine. This will prompt new reminders to pause and notice what’s around you.
• Do things that require participation at a slower pace. Take a cooking class or a long sauna. Go camping or volunteer your time. Some things in life make it more difficult to rush.
• Lose the guilt. Remind yourself that pausing and slowing down aren’t weak or lazy. They are intentional methods for finding and creating even more value.
• Hang around people who slow you down. Do you have people in your life who cause you to slow down? Notice how they can help you recalibrate your own pace.

I’ve been trying to imagine daily that I’m still on that twilight nature hike, that I’m forced to stay at the pace of the non-anxious guide, paying more attention to the subtle things within and around me.

I think the Dutch are on to something. Niksen leads to greater happiness and productivity.

How’s your pace right now?

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About the Author. Matt Norman coaches and advises executives on how to build great people and culture. He is president and CEO of Norman & Associates, which offers custom coaching and consulting in the areas of talent strategy, personal effectiveness, planning, and goal alignment to help people improve how they communicate, lead, influence, and work together. He’s also the award-winning author of Four Patterns of Healthy People.

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