Are You a Resilient Dater?

Resilience keeps coming up in my coaching. Many of my clients have (or I help them develop) resilience – the ability to bounce back after being rejected by someone they hoped would turn into “the one.”

Webster defines resilience as the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness.

So how tough are you when you get the cold should or the “we’re not a match” retort?

Are you still pining away for a pst love hoping tney’ll change their mind?

Snap out of it! What really matters is that someone values you, your efforts, and your attention. And if they don’t, well, I sugggest you move on!

So, let’s examine what a resilient dater looks like:

·????????A resilient dater knows what they want and keeps moving forward. If they get rejected, it may sting for a short while, and then they get back into actino. They get back out there so they can meet new people in ordre to find the one for them.

·????????A resilient dater understands that a relationshp is about fit and that they may not be what the other person is looking for. Your goals and values may not match up. There should be no hard feelings if that’s the case.

·????????A resilient dater keeps their ogals in mind. For example, if you’re looking for marriage and kids, you won’t compromise on this unless your goal changes or it no longer serves you.

·????????A resilient dater sees themself in a coupled relationship. And they keep trying to meet the right person. And yes, they do eventually meet that special someone. (When my clients don’t give up, they do succeed in the end!)

·????????A resilient dater learns from their past experiences. The use that knowledge of what works and what doesn’t to imporve te next relationship’s chances for success.

·????????A resilient dater uses humor to deflect their disappointment and sees the ironic side of life. Not taking everyhting so seriously is helpful in riding the bumps in the road.

·????????And a resilient dater has a good support system to champion them as they get back up after they get knocked down.

For instance, when Tim, a divorced dad in his 50s kept getting “no thank you’s” and “I see you as a friend’s” from ladies he was interested in. But he didn’t give up on his goal of having a companion. And eventually, he did meet a lovely woman who appreciates him and who also desired a long-term committed relationship. He kept his vision alive and didn’t give up.

As his coach, I reinforced his fine qualities and assured him that he was going to meet a woman who’d appreciate his efforts. Knowing Tim, I truly believed he had the ability to be in a loving relationship and that it was going to happen for him.

Dating for a serious, committed relationship takes focus and resolve.

If you’re ready to do what it takes to find a committted, loving relatinoshiop, then let’s talk. Go to the link in the comments and let’s get you on track forfinding the ideal partner for you! As a coach, I will support you fully as you put your heart out there again.