How to start a new life #1

If you really believed in who you were, what you were put here to do and everything that you dreamed of, you could do anything.

You could make something from nothing. You could create a world that didn’t exist yet simply from the spark of imagination that danced throughout your mind. Something could be birthed from you that you might not even understand at the beginning, but as the years go on you get to look back and clearly see how all of the dots connect.

The amount of faith it takes to step into these moments are huge. Sometimes those moments are pressured on us through tragic circumstances. Sometimes that are moments of light that come into our mind. Nonetheless, they are important no matter how they come into your life.

The truth is, my moment of creation didn’t come from a happy place.

It came from a place of being down and out. It came from feeling like I was completely in the dirt. It came when I had lost myself completely and was suffering every single day.

That’s how I started.

Suffering.

Suffering and seeking answers on how to make my life just a little bit better every single day. One day at a time I worked on something I wasn’t that great at. Those days eventually added up…

…and here I am.

Dreams have a price.

And trust me, you pay.

You have to pay every single day.

But the greatest thing that I ever struggled with was the quiet. At times, for years, it got very lonely. Yes there were always breaks in this silence with friends calling and spending time out, but most of the time it was just me working on what I needed to build. Brick by brick it all went up and I learned from the big mistakes I made with many different things.

I don’t think we were given dreams by accident.

I think that we were given these visions in our minds and the path that will take us there as one great test of life. Will we work through all of our fears and our worries to make it happen? Or will we stop short and not see it all the way through. The truth is, most never see it all the way through.

Somewhere along the line, they stop. They stop because of one reason or another and the dream gets taken to the grave with them.

I’ve been to a place where I actually put everything aside for a while. I felt this ripping and tearing feeling inside of my gut that caused so much anxiety and worry that I knew I could never fully “turn it off.” I had to keep going no matter how painfully quiet or exhausting it was at times.

There’s this very romantic concept around creating something from a dream.

But honestly, it’s not what you think it is. Yes of course there’s a huge payoff at the end, but the path to get you there is one of the most grueling experiences you will go through. There are long hours, little amounts of play, a ton of hard work and a very lonely path. There’s no way around it.

Because to get one thing, you often have to give up another.

I see a lot of people around me today talking about what they want to do in the future and yet I’m looking at what they are doing right now and there’s a huge mismatch between words and action.

That’s the glue that puts it all together. Integrity. You know…the thing that exists when your words and your actions are in perfect alignment. Because without that – nothing happens. A lack of integrity is the recipe for a dying dream. If you want to truly fail – that’s where you should begin.

I am heading into one of the most wild, adventurous, and crazy parts of my life – leaving everything behind . I have absolutely no idea what’s going to happen, but I do know what I want to create while I am there. I also know this…

This time is a once in a lifetime opportunity for me.

I might never have this moment again. So I realize I have to take everything in as much as I can.

I haven’t been writing as much lately because I know how much is coming right around the corner. Life will be breathed back into my veins even more and I will be turning the pages into the full next chapter of my life in a few weeks. But this time right now is for seeing friends and spending time with those who I care about dearly. It isn’t time to write yet.

It’s time to say goodbye to an old life. One that I have no regrets about. It’s time to breathe into a new one.