Are You Ok?

May is Mental Health Awareness Month. And the news about the state of mental health are nothing but heartbreaking.

Over 51 million American adults (around 20% of the US population) have recently experienced a mental illness, but only 44.8% of them received treatment. Between February 2020 and March 2021, there was a 93% increase in mental health-related emergency department visits among children aged 12-17 years. And, of course, the COVID pandemic made it all worst with 4 in 10 adults in the U.S. reporting symptoms of anxiety or depression.

One of the most painful statistics is suicide rates. In 2019, 47,511 people died by suicide. And it's not hard to connect the increasing rate of suicides with the increasing rate of depression. In 2019, approximately 17.3 million adults in the US experienced at least one major depressive episode in 2019. During the onset of the COVID pandemic (2020), that number skyrocket 8.5% compared to 2019.

Unfortunately, the rate of mental illness among young adults is also increasing, with 29% of adults aged 18-24 experiencing a mental illness (2020).

One more data point: mental health conditions are the leading cause of disability worldwide. In the US alone, mental health conditions are the second leading cause of disability.

And work is not making it any better.

In 2020, 43% of employed adults in the United States reported that their mental health had worsened due to the pandemic. A number that has not improved since. In 2021, research found that over 50% of American workers were experiencing burnout. 18% of full time worker in the US now report constant symptoms of work-related depression and anxiety (which is estimated to cost $1 trillion in lost productivity worldwide).

If this doesn't create an urgent case for immediate and serious action, then I don't know what will.

In one of my recent posts I discussed how the time to act is now to improve mental health and overall well-being . Evidently, the current situation is horrifying, but it isn't too late to take serious action before we hit an inflection point with no return (or a very costly and painful one).

In this post I discuss a more nuanced approach to solving the mental health crisis: by supporting one another at work.

Supporting One Another at Work

Many of your coworkers (and perhaps you, too) are struggling with mental health illnesses and conditions that are subtly or severely affecting their life and, of course, their performance at work as well. Whether you can see it or not, whether you can sense it or not, their struggles are real.

Some folks at work show a smile everyday and seem to be very happy, and they can be struggling with some serious and severe challenges. Others seem to have changed and maybe their mood is not what it used to be.

Sometimes you see the signs, but, very often, some of those signs are either invisible or too subtle or start showing up little by little.

Ultimately, this is what matters: caring for one another, supporting each other, and treating people with kindness and compassion. We really don't know what they are going through, whether they smile all day or the signs of their struggles are visible.

While the mental health crisis in America and the world is severe, and I don't want to oversimply its complexity (the complexity of its root causes and the complexity of its solutions), there are every day things we can do at work to create conditions for mental health and overall well-being improvement. Around half of Americans diagnosed with a mental illness need medication. But that means that at least the other half has not crossed that threshold yet, and there is a lot that we can do for all of them.

One way to do so is by being kind and compassionate at work through engaging in conversations that can be initiated simply by asking: "are you ok?"

However, I know how uncomfortable it can feel to ask such a simple question (are you ok?) for both the person who asks and the recipient of the question.

If you don't feel that the phrasing of that question is appropriate, here you have a list of several alternative ways to ask "are you ok?" to initiate a conversation that can be, literally, a life saving one for that coworker.

One last thought: I always say this "think big, act small". In the context of mental health, thinking big means dreaming of a workplace where people are holistically healthy. How do we make it happen? Well, by "acting small". And that means something like simply asking: "are you ok"? (in whatever way you choose to ask that question).

Are you OK?

20 alternatives way to ask "are you ok?":

• How are you doing today? Is there anything you would like to chat about? I am here for you!
• How are you feeling?
• What's new with you that you are excited or worried about?
• What has been on your mind lately?
• Is there anything I can do to support you right now?
• Do you have time to get together for coffee and get to know each other better?
• How are you managing work and life challenges at the moment?
• How are you coping with your current workload?
• What is stressing about work?
• Are there things in your personal life that may be impacting your work, or vice versa? Do you want to talk about it?
• How is this year/month/week going so far for you?
• What are your plans for this week? Do you want to schedule some time to chat?
• Do you want to talk?
• I am concerned about you, is there anything that is bothering you and I can help you with?
• Is there someone you would like to talk to?
• How are you things going?
• What's on your mind?
• How are you taking care of yourself lately?
• Is there anything you want to talk about?
• Are there things that are causing you stress or anxiety?

Am I OK?

Who cares for the caregiver? Who cares for you when you are trying to care for others, but you have your own struggles?

I hope that a lot of people are caring for you as much or more than you care for others. But this is the true: caring for you has to begin with you.

Self-care is essential. We can't pour from an empty cup. We can't give what we don't have. If we are not OK, how can we help others be OK?

I want to encourage you to check-in with yourself and your mental health.

Check out the list of questions that I created to ask yourself "Am I OK?". These are some basic questions for a self-care discovery process that leads us to valuable insights about the state of our mental health.

Please note that I am not adding a course of action in relation to your response to any of these questions, but I hope that the discovery process you are about to engage in by asking yourself these discussions can lead to increased awareness and intuition about what the next steps should be. And even if you don't have an idea about what the actual next steps should be, at least you realize that you do need to take steps to improve your mental health.

• How am I feeling right now about life and the work that I am doing?
• Am I feeling stressed? What are the causes of my stress?
• How am I coping with challenges and stressors?
• What kind of recurring thoughts are negatively impacting me?
• Am I feeling exhausted more often than before? Is this happening sporadically or am I always exhausted?
• How am I responding to challenging situations?
• Have I been more irritable or easily angered about situations that in the past wouldn't have made me feel this way?
• Do I feel valued by my peers and leaders at work? Do I feel valued by myself?
• Can I concentrate in the tasks at hand? Or am I getting more easily distracted and off-track when I am working on something?
• Do I have personal boundaries that I and others are respecting? Do I have personal boundaries, at all? How am I "enforcing" those personal boundaries?
• How is my sleep doing these days? Am I sleeping enough? Am I getting quality sleep?
• Am I properly regulating my emotions or am I unconsciously snapping at people?
• Am I finding enjoyment in the activities I do in life and work?
• Am I feeling motivated?
• How am I connecting to other people? How am I maintaining healthy relationships with coworkers and my beloved ones? How am I managing conflicts with those around me?
• What am I noticing about my mental health and overall well-being that worries me?
• How is my energy level?
• Are there things that are activating positive emotions in me? What kinds of things?
• Am I dedicating time to self-care? What kind of activities am I engaging in to improve my mental health and overall well-being?
• Do I need help? Am I able to recognize situations that I can't manage on my own and need support from others, including professional help?

-------

By Enrique Rubio, Founder of Hacking HR

(Note: I write fast, speak fast and read fast. Sometimes - often times - I don't see the typos! Please let me know if there are typos or grammatical misconstructions in my write ups. It happened to Shakespeare, it certainly can happen to me. Do so with kindness, compassion and grace, though. I appreciate it!)

-------

Hacking HR Challenge: “From Burned Out to Fired Up”

The "From Burned Out to Fired Up" Challenge is a 15-day journey that focuses on simple, practical, and effective ways to improve your well-being and recharge your batteries. Each day, you will engage in a small self-care activity that can be completed in 15 minutes or less, with the goal of cultivating and nurturing your self-care and, ultimately, help you flourish with sustainable effort that fires you up instead of burn you out.

We started the challenge on May 1 and it runs until May 15. Stay tuned as we are opening it again on May 16.