You are now ready and is about to do something brave and important, You certainly deserve success!

We all know, more successful a person becomes, when he is more self aware. Every human being possess feelings of doubt and uncertainty about oneself, and lack of self-esteem at some point or the other in life. Most fight such subconscious feelings by constantly pressing them towards its own conquest and overcompensating, resulting in spectacular achievements.

People are haunted with self doubts on own beauty, handsomeness, hair, colour, body fitness, capability for public speaking, amaze wealth, achieving positions, obtaining more power , being liked etc ..one or the other feeling will keep raising in the mind for all of us..

The story, I recently heard of a girl gave a good perspective on this conquest ..

35 years back , There was a beautiful girl at Mumbai ..She belonged to a middle class family.

Even though she never aspired to look like a barbie doll , She was constantly taunted on her skin color by her close relatives, as her sister was much fairer.. in every family function she used to hear such belittling comments and she started developing a complex within her.

Most of the times, she didn’t care a damn about looks those days and never even applied any cream, lotion, or powder in her school days . She was happy in her own world during those days.

But when she moved into teenage years, she saw most girls around her spend a good lot of time on make up and Parlours post the college hours. She also started feeling uneasy with such comments and felt uncomfortable to get ready or go for marriages and other family functions. For the last look, when she leaned into her bedroom mirror just before leaving , she used to wonder why she doesn’t look like her sister or the heroins of movies she liked. The celebrities she liked, looked much more fairer and beautiful.

During one of her city visit, she happened to meet a make up woman of one of the boliwood actress of that time. She was shocked to know the reality of her favourite stars, when the woman told her that nobody woke up like that. Neither her heroin boss , Hema Malini or Rekha ...nor any other actress. (Not even Marilyn Monroe ). Then she shared the real deal:

Before each public appearance, they spend 90 minutes in a makeup chair. Three to six people work on their hair and makeup, while a professional touches up her nails. Her eyebrows are tweezed and threaded every week. There’s concealer on parts of their body that they could never have predicted would need concealing.

They are up at 6am every day and at the gym by 7:30. They exercise for 90 minutes and, some evenings, again before bed. It’s someone’s full-time job to decide what they can and cannot eat. There are more ingredients in their face packs than in their food. There’s a team dedicated to finding then flattering outfits. After all that, if they are still not “flawless” enough, there are generous servings of Photoshop.

So dear girl, It takes an army, a lot of money, and an incredible amount of time to make a female celebrity look the way she does when you see her. It isn’t realistic, and it isn’t anything to aspire to.

This understanding helped her immensely and gave her a better confidence, a happy feel and she felt there is no need to look in any specific way to be beautiful.

She has grown ..focused on her studies, scored well in her subjects .. got scholarships .. became a post graduate, got a job through her own search.. moved to better companies. Did well in her career. Became a CXO in her company.

She also realised having a loving heart and a graceful smile is the real beauty a woman can have, when you are an achiever. Showing care in every engagement is beauty , laughing freely and having a sense of humour is beauty. She also visited the parlour when she felt there is a need. She maintained a good collection of dresses in her wardrobe, nicely draped her saris, went out well groomed. She also got few creams, lotion and powder for her dressing table. Looking elegant was her only lookout those days. People tend to find her more beautiful with her continued career successes.

She also realised once you have few positive attributes people tend to attribute more positive attributes with you. Her confidence always reflected in the manner she talked , sat and walked, so obviously she looked more attractive.

Now a days, every time she see a 13-year-old girl gazing wistfully at a blemish-free, shiny-haired Bollywood actress on a magazine cover, she talked to them lovingly and busts the myth of flawlessness for her.

She tells the girl, how beautiful she is. Praise her smile or her laugh or her mind or her gait.

She always wants to tell her parents, don't let any one grow up like me believing that I was flawed or that there was anything I was lacking for looking different from a fairer relative or a woman on a billboard.

She says, I today don’t hold myself to a standard that’s too high, even for the women on the billboards.

She tells the ones to whom she can freely speak , that beauty is actually a distinctive personality; one who can laugh at anything, including themselves, and one who is especially kind and caring to others. ... A woman who can inexplicably make you feel really good just by being around her, and yet brings such great sadness when she is gone is a beautiful woman. If you and your friends feel you are pretty’; awesome’; ‘delicious’; ‘amazing’—sure that indicate the single thing : You .... You are really beautiful.

Sure this is the story of an ordinary girl who turned her insecurities to become a woman who shines like a star .

Many high-achievers struggle with the thoughts that they are incompetent, despite a track record of accomplishments. While no one is immune from self-doubt, it actually impacts high-achievers the most and can show up in many areas of their lives including the ones at work and life outside .

When such feelings hit us, we all should know that we are not alone. Your inner critic is only trying to protect you, so do your best to practice self-compassion. For example, if your inner critic is cautioning that you may not be ready to pursue a new career path, address its concerns constructively. Use it as an opportunity to honestly assess your skills and evaluate gaps you need to fill.

So, it’s time to start viewing your emotions–the good and the “bad”– for what they are: your greatest strength and most valuable tool. Hearing the voice of your inner critic only mean you are now ready and is about to do something brave and important to you.

Wishing you the best in your life and continued success ..