You are NEVER going to get it all done.

And if you keep telling yourself that, you definitely won’t. Here are some methods that work for me for getting most of it done without losing my mind.

First I need to start this LinkedIn Long Form Post by saying, I know how incredibly spoiled I am. I have an amazing support system at work and at home. I don’t know how people do it who don’t have that, or more specifically, I know why they are crazed.

As many of you know, we had our second child four months ago. Our first turned two years old about three weeks after our second was born. This is not a “poor pitiful me” routine, we all have our battles. This is simply a post about how I make it all work (sorry, I’m laughing so hard I can’t type)…how I attempt to make it all work, in the hopes someone might find a few of these nuggets helpful.

Know your Boundaries

I used to say yes to everything. Member of a new committee – yes! Board seat on that non-profit I volunteer for – yes! The project somewhat outside of our wheelhouse that is going to tax our resources – yes! Mystery reader at my daughter’s preschool – yes! (and I’d say yes to this one a million times over). In the last five years, even before kids, I realized I was giving people a less available, more exhausted, less focused version of myself. So, I’ve re-assessed my ability to give quality over quantity and realize it’s ok to say no once in a while.

Ebbs and Flows

There are times that you are going to have to work 80 hours a week…but it shouldn’t be every week. Know when the flows are becoming too consistent and your personal life is turning into a distant memory. Certainly, there are some things that only you can do. But, if there is someone else on your team better resourced for the tasks, ask for help. If something is going to take me a week to finish because I have a busier/meeting-heavy schedule then it becomes a much better use of time to ask someone else who can dedicate three hours in one day and get it done.

Multi-task Like a Champ!

Two kids at home, two companies (mine and my husband’s), lots of family goings-on of late, and a non-profit I try to give a handful of hours a week has taken its toll. I was always a decent multi-tasker but now I must say, I’m award-winning. Conference calls while I make food for the babe or in the car (if I don’t need to take notes). The biggest challenge is my ability to get in more than two workouts a week. This one still needs work, but I’ve committed to taking more calls while on a walk, playing with my kids in ways where I can get my heart rate up (have you ever tried lifting a 30 pound toddler over your head 20 times?), and doing squats or push-ups during calls that require note-taking (stand up desk makes this much easier…we all have this one).

Less Sleep? No Problem.

I have always been someone who needed sleep…like a-full-eight-hours-or-else kind of sleep. There comes a time when that just isn’t possible. I used to stress and lay in bed counting how few hours of sleep I was getting. I realized the best thing I can do is not look. I stopped looking at the clock when I’m feeding the babe. I’ve stopped mentally noting what time I went to bed and I’ve stopped looking at the clock if I get up before my alarm. While your body still tells you when you’re tired at least you’re not dwelling on it all day. Oh, and no caffeine helps but I know my audience.

Plan, Plan, Over Plan.

Everything from dinner for the week (including take-out) to interviewing sitters even when you don’t need them just yet, I like to be prepared for the worst-case scenario. But I was just planning for tasks and meetings and nights out…I wasn’t thinking long term. I was recently introduced to PandaPlanner.com which has blown my mind in the capacity. Instead of me explaining you should just watch their viral video [their words not mine] here.

Pay for Convenience

I’ve hesitated to add this as it gives the impression I’m a little (dare I say) high maintenance but there’s a point here, I promise. Maybe it’s different for me since I own a business and my pay ebbs and flows with how well that business is doing, but I am willing to pay for convenience. For example, I pay to have someone come to my house and pick up what the dog leaves behind when she’s romping in the yard. Yes, Terrance from Pet Scoop visits us once a week and my husband and I literally have NOTHING to argue about anymore. The two-year-old isn’t stepping in dog poo and I didn’t have to spend my time picking it up. And before you think I’m nuts, the cost per month is less than what I would pay myself to go pick it up.

Ok, I realize this next one may really seem over-the-top, but I get my hair blown out twice a month while on my laptop to get uninterrupted work done. If you have a Blo Dry Bar or Glam Squad near you it’s totally reasonable and they totally get that you’re going to be working while they make you look presentable for your meeting. The best is getting a blow dry while you’re traveling. I know, seems a bit much but between the little ones, (read here aging parents, friends in need, desire to have a life outside of work), running a business, sales, travel, still being a milk machine, and trying to keep up with friends and family, it is a worthwhile expense in my opinion. Maybe I’ll think otherwise when the littlest is sleeping through the night, but right now this is totally my jam.

Spend Time with Your Kids/Parents/Friends…it Matters

My husband and I, addicted to our SmartPhones like everyone else, have committed to putting our phones away when we’re with our kids. Screen time by parents has shown to be more damaging than kids' own screen time. Now, I’m speaking to you as the kid who remembers her parents never had time for her at a really young age. I know I’m the exception that remembers things from age two but it’s given me such a different perspective as a parent. I was someone who was always super connected, phone on me at all times. I don’t know what I thought would happen if I didn’t respond right away! Now I come home and unless it’s still working hours, my phone is charging. I’ll glance at it once in a while but it is no longer an extension of my arm. My kids need to see me listening, engaging, asking about their day, letting them know they matter. And it only gets more and more important as they get older. I try to remind my team that I’m emailing/calling/texting you because I am thinking of something right at that moment and if I don’t send an email, I will completely forget! Once it’s on your voicemail or in your email I can go about my day. If something is urgent I let my team know.

Fortunately, we’re a well-oiled machine. I can’t remember the last time we had a fire drill, that required instant attention. Not only do we have a “put the phone down” rule at home, I try to take an hour each week with each kid and hope my team does the same (or do yoga, mountain bike, or walk along the beach if they have one). If it means I’m working a little late or a little early another day, so be it. The two-year-old and I do swim class together and the baby and I start music together in the fall. I love that time with each of them watching them learn and grow. As they get older it will be even more important…and less likely they’ll want the time. Seeing my niece going off to college, the fact that we have so little time to help shape who they will become, hit home even more. With all the unrest in the country today I want to make sure I did my part to make them good, compassionate, strong, caring people who fight for what they believe. Someone recently said to me when referring to work versus family/friends, “It’s (work) all just an illusion. Kids, your family, that’s reality.”