You need to be accepted by yourself

First knowing how the concept of acceptance works.A person can accept something when his subconscious mind believes that this thing cannot be changed. The main reason people accept death and suffer from breakups is that they know that the person who died can't come back. So what does this has to do with accepting yourself? In order to become more accepting of yourself you must: Make sure that you are trying to accept something that cannot be changed: Don't get acceptance wrong like most people do by trying to accept something that can be changed. Your subconscious mind will refuse to accept this fact and you will just end up fooling yourself

Acceptance is hard work: Accepting yourself doesn't mean that you should be defeated or helpless but on the contrary acceptance is all about not feeling bad about the current situation while finding another way to improve it. Accepting the loss of your job doesn't mean that you should do nothing but it means that you should be doing your best to find another job. When someone asks me how to accept myself I tell him first you should do something about what you don't like before thinking about acceptance

You can't just love yourself instantly: The same goes for loving yourself. You can't just stand in front of a mirror and say i like myself while you know that you still need to work on many of your personality traits that must be changed. Don't use acceptance as an excuse: Many people use self acceptance as an excuse to avoid hard work and to run away from responsibility. This type of self acceptance never works as the subconscious is always smart enough to recognize the trick. So,trying to accept yourself without trying to change what you don't like will certainly never help you build self confidence.

If you really want to learn to accept yourself then you must learn first how to change everything that can be changed then accept what cannot be changed.Yes you must accept your skin color because there is nothing that can be done about it but you should never try to accept the fact that you are not successful because that is something that can be changed. Do you know why do you feel bad when you try to accept yourself? Its because trying to accept something that can be changed is the same as admitting defeat.

Let me tell you about how messed up I was and how I'm feeling now. I never really liked anyone, mainly because I'm an introvert and because, I just don't like the drama. As a result of this, I didn't like myself either. When I didn’t even like myself, I thought I was a loser. That I'm weird and boring and a thousand other things! I tried so many times to be different. To change my personality to someone that I would like myself to be. It worked for several weeks, my personal best was only 1 months, tops. It never worked. It was just a disguise. I eventually hated myself even more whenever I started thinking “what am I even doing ?!?!” . So it was clear as daylight to me that constant attempts to force myself to be someone else isn't going to work.

I started thinking, again. For almost 6 months. Maybe even more, I don't remember exactly.I kept thinking and there was it. Acceptance. Here's how I did it. It's easy to say. Hard to imagine. Even harder to practise. I accepted that I'm different. Everybody is different. You just have to figure out what your kind of difference is. You have to figure out what defines your character. You have to analyse yourself and figure out what are the main things that makes you different from other people out there and you should find a way to be happy about that. You asking a question like this alone is enough to know that you are different, in a good way. Once you find out the good and the bad and the evil about your character, start liking it and then eventually fall in love with those. Which bring to my next point..

Fall in love with your personality. Fall in love with your physical appearance. Go in front of a mirror and take a good look at yourself. I don't care if you are fat or skinny. I don't care if you pretty or ugly. You have to believe that you are hot either way! Accepting one's self has two sides. Empowering your attitude towards yourself is now done. Now, you gotta adjust your attitude towards other people because ‘you’ are a part of a society, which means how you response to them is important.

First of all, Stop giving s shit about what they think! Yeah, that's right. Many of us, including myself, we mostly don't like ourselves because a particular person or a group of people don't like us. I used to worry about this a lot and it drained all my energy I had within myself. One day, I asked myself, I had to ask myself, “seriously ?!?!”. That was when I decided I should stop caring about what other people think of me or what they might think of me. At the end of the day it's the way you see yourself is what matters. Not the opinion of a guy you barely know about!

After these simple modifications, now I love myself. I believe in myself. I still get knocked down to the ground though. But until this day, I've always managed to get back up sooner or later because I trust myself with that. If you can't feel it, say it. “I accept myself, as I am now, without reservation.” And again: “I accept myself, as I am now, without reservation.” And a third time. 3X works best. The whole point is, you don't really have a choice. Well, you do, if you want to go on as before, at odds with yourself. Like Siamese twins at loggerheads. But you don't have a choice, not really. The fact is, you're here, and that can't be argued. Get over it! See if you can find a way to live it. And to love it. Cheers!