Are you a Narcissistic Leader?

How to recognize if you are a Narcissistic Leader—and What to do about It…

As leaders, we want to inspire, motivate, and create environments where our teams can flourish. But when our leadership style centers more on our own importance and validation than on supporting others, we risk falling into narcissistic tendencies that can harm both ourselves and those we lead. Narcissistic leadership often damages morale, productivity, and trust, creating a toxic work culture that can lead to high turnover and poor performance.

The good news? Recognizing narcissistic tendencies in yourself is the first step toward creating a healthier, more impactful leadership style. By becoming aware of the red flags and understanding the potential negative impacts on both yourself and your team, you can shift toward a leadership style rooted in empathy, humility, accountability and collaboration.

The Impact of Narcissistic Leadership

For the Leader: Narcissistic leaders may initially feel confident and powerful, but over time, this behavior can backfire. A focus on personal validation and self-importance can lead to isolation, as colleagues and team members may gradually distrust or resent them. Narcissistic leaders often experience burnout, high stress, and dissatisfaction, as their success is tied to external validation that can be inconsistent or fleeting. Without a strong support network or genuine connections, they may find themselves without allies or advocates when facing challenges.?

For the Team: Narcissistic leadership can create a toxic environment where trust, collaboration, and psychological safety are severely undermined. Team members may feel undervalued, ignored, or fearful of making mistakes, leading to high turnover, low morale, and decreased innovation. As a result, the organization suffers from high stress levels, lower productivity, and difficulty retaining top talent.

Below are key red flags that might indicate narcissistic tendencies in your leadership approach, along with practical steps to address and correct them.

1. Constant Need for Praise and Recognition

• Red Flag: You find yourself constantly seeking validation and feeling disappointed if team members or peers don’t acknowledge your contributions. This craving for praise can lead to irritation or resentment when someone else is recognized for their work.
• Impact: When leaders are driven by praise, they’re more likely to prioritize their image over the team’s needs. Team members may feel that their contributions are minimized or overlooked, which can reduce motivation and engagement.
• Solution: Shift the focus to team accomplishments. Start meetings by authentically celebrating collective successes and acknowledging specific contributions from individuals. Reframe personal validation as team success, building pride around group accomplishments rather than individual recognition.

2. Difficulty Accepting Criticism

• Red Flag: You react defensively or emotionally to feedback, seeing criticism as a personal attack. Instead of viewing it as a growth opportunity, you may justify actions or shift blame to avoid vulnerability.?
• Impact: Narcissistic leaders who react poorly to feedback create a culture of fear, where employees hesitate to voice concerns or offer constructive criticism. This stifles innovation and prevents the team from learning from mistakes, as members avoid candid discussions to protect themselves.
• Solution: Embrace a growth mindset and view feedback as an opportunity for improvement. Practice active listening and taking deep breaths when receiving criticism. Commit to implementing one actionable change based on feedback. This openness not only improves your leadership but also encourages a feedback-friendly culture within the team.

3. Taking Credit for Team Successes

• Red Flag: You often take credit for the team’s achievements, speaking about accomplishments in terms of “I” rather than “we.” Opportunities to highlight team contributions may go unmentioned, leaving others feeling undervalued.
• Impact: When leaders regularly take credit for team successes, team members may feel resentful, unmotivated, and less invested in their work. Over time, this can lead to disengagement and even turnover, as employees seek workplaces where they feel their contributions are appreciated.
• Solution: Make it a habit to use “we” language when discussing achievements. Spotlight your team and specific team members before speaking about yourself by highlighting specific contributions made. When people feel recognized for their efforts, they’re more likely to remain motivated, productive, and loyal to the organization.

4. Lack of Empathy for Team Members’ Challenges

• Red Flag: You find it difficult or unnecessary to understand or relate to your team members’ personal challenges or setbacks. You may feel frustrated when their needs affect productivity or perceive emotional responses as distractions.
• Impact: A lack of empathy can create an unsupportive work environment, where team members feel isolated and unimportant. This can lead to stress, low morale, and burnout, as employees feel they’re not valued as individuals.
• Solution: Cultivate empathy by engaging with your team beyond work tasks. Ask open-ended questions and listen to their perspectives, especially during difficult times. Demonstrating genuine care helps build trust, fosters a sense of belonging, and enhances morale across the team.

5. Entitlement and Expectation of Special Treatment

• Red Flag: You believe that your position entitles you to privileges or exemptions that others don’t receive. You may expect others to prioritize your requests or assume your perspective is inherently superior to others.
• Impact: Entitled behavior from leaders can breed resentment and lower morale, as team members sense a double standard in the workplace. This lack of fairness creates divisions and erodes respect for leadership.
• Solution: Reframe leadership as a position of service rather than entitlement. Approach every decision as an opportunity to empower your team and ensure fairness. Small acts of humility—like sharing in tasks others usually handle—can demonstrate your commitment to equality and build respect among team members.

6. Using Manipulation to Achieve Goals

• Red Flag: You find yourself bending situations or using flattery to get what you want, rationalizing it as strategic. Manipulative tactics can involve withholding information or pitting team members against each other to maintain control.
• ?Impact: Manipulation erodes trust, creating an environment of insecurity and competition rather than collaboration. This can lead to a toxic culture where employees feel they must watch their backs, which reduces cooperation and openness.
• ?Solution: Practice transparency and straightforward communication. Share expectations clearly and encourage open discussions. When team members know they’re being treated honestly, they feel safer and more committed to the organization’s goals.

7. Prioritizing Personal Success Over Team Development

• Red Flag: You focus more on yourself and your own career growth than on developing your team members. Activities that highlight your achievements may take precedence over providing mentorship or professional development opportunities for others.
• ?Impact: When leaders prioritize personal success above their team’s success, team members feel sidelined and unsupported. This can cause high turnover, as employees seek other roles where they feel invested in and where their growth is valued.
• ?Solution: Commit to team-centered goals by setting specific objectives to support each member’s development. Offer regular one-on-one meetings, advocate for training, and celebrate team achievements over personal ones. Making others’ growth a priority creates loyalty, strengthens engagement, and contributes to a collaborative work culture.

Transforming Narcissistic Leadership into Servant Leadership

Identifying narcissistic tendencies is the first step to positive change. Moving away from a self-centered approach to a service-oriented leadership style doesn’t happen overnight, but with intentional effort, you can cultivate a more balanced, empathetic, and effective way of leading.

Practical Steps for Sustainable Change:

1. Self-Reflection: Set aside time for regular self-reflection. Consider keeping a journal or working with a coach to understand patterns and track progress in reducing narcissistic tendencies.
2. Build a Feedback Culture: Encourage open feedback from your team and practice accepting it with an open mind. By modeling openness to input, you foster an environment where everyone feels empowered to improve.
3. Focus on Team-Centered Goals as much as Personal Goals: Shift from individual accomplishments to collective goals. Set measurable, team-based objectives, and celebrate these successes. This reinforces a culture of collaboration and shared purpose.
4. Celebrate Others’ Successes: Make it a habit to spotlight team contributions and recognize achievements that align with company values. This demonstrates that you prioritize team success over personal recognition.
5. Seek Coaching and Leadership Development: Engage with a mentor or leadership coach who can help guide your transformation. They can offer objective feedback and help you stay accountable in building new habits and perspectives.

Final Thoughts: Recognizing narcissistic traits within yourself takes courage, but it’s a critical step toward becoming a leader who inspires and uplifts rather than dominates, gaslights and controls. By addressing these red flags with self-awareness, empathy, and intentional actions, you can create a psychologically safe work environment where trust, respect, and collaboration flourish. In the long run, shifting from narcissistic to servant leadership will benefit not only your team but also your own personal growth, professional development, and fulfillment as a leader. A legacy built on empathy and integrity is one that will be remembered and respected.

By: Dr. Steven Jones, CEO

Global LeaderSHYFT, inc.