Are you in a “love-hate” relationship with teaching?

You will often hear teachers describing teaching as “the best job in the world”. And I wholeheartedly agree: who wouldn’t want to spend their days with young people, sharing your passion for your subject and seeing your students grow and develop? (Also, it’s a wonderful source of hilarious anecdotes!)

But

It’s also one of the most stressful jobs going. In 2015, Sir Cary Cooper suggested that teaching is in the top three most stressful occupations, alongside healthcare and the uniformed services. And it is pretty obvious why: a never ending workload, lack of appreciation, poor behaviour and education being treated like a political football all combine to create an unhealthy sector.

At school, you’re looking around your department and seeing that some of your colleagues appear to be LOVING their job. They are enthusiastic, energised and working all hours in order to lap up as much of the teaching experience as possible in a quest to be the best teacher for their students.

You wish you were more like them. You do like teaching but the resentment towards the long hours and endless tasks is growing. You think, “I don’t have a life. My job is everything. This is it until the half term break!” and the frustration builds.

Then the guilt sets in.

You feel bad for your students. You feel like they deserve better than what you are giving (even though you are giving everything you’ve got). You think you “should” do everything you can for your students. You believe that your job — your life — is to care for them, teach them and guide them as they grow. You feel guilty for wanting to have a life for yourself outside of teaching.

You are not alone.

These feelings of guilt, overwhelm and resentment are common in teaching. Unfortunately, it’s a way of life that many educators count down the days until the next half term break.

There is another way.

Read these three tips that will help you to become happier in teaching and thrive both inside and outside the classroom:

1) Teaching: it’s just a job

Calling teaching a “vocation” invites the misconception that you are meant to dedicate your entire life to the job. However, this is false. You are entitled to a life beyond the classroom. Teaching is like putting on a mask: you arrive at school and play the part of “Miss” or “Sir”. The challenge is that often, the mask comes home with you and eventually becomes so effectively glued to your face that you begin to lose a sense of who you are outside of the classroom.

Yet, remember that you are first a human being — a person — before you are a teacher. Therefore, give yourself permission to take the mask off and enjoy life beyond teaching. This will revitalise you and enable you to love your job again.

2) Create Boundaries

Do you ever find yourself chilling on the sofa watching TV and find yourself thinking about school? Or just about to drift off to sleep and something you forgot to do pops into your head?

Boundaries are not just physical. Often it is the thought of school that follows you home rather than any specific work. It’s the realisation that all you think about or talk about is school. It is so draining.

The first step to creating mental boundaries to protect yourself from teaching is noticing these thoughts. Pause. Take a moment to observe these thoughts in your mind and let them drift away without dragging you along with them. Practising mindfulness is a brilliant method for developing this skill. The?Calm app ?is a great place to start.

3) Say “No”

It’s a small word but is feared by many. You want to be amenable, someone that colleagues and students rely on. Yet, by saying “yes” to covering that lesson, or attending that parent meeting or answering more emails, what are you saying “no” to?

You are saying “no” to yourself. You are saying “no” to protecting your precious time so you can get today’s tasks done. You are saying “no” to leaving on time so you can rest in the evening. You are saying “no” to your priorities that help you to be an effective teacher.

There is always give and take. By saying “no”, you are offering your colleagues, line manager, senior leadership (and even students) a clear understanding of where your boundaries are. Saying “no” does not mean that you are being stubborn, selfish or refusing to comply. You are within your right to draw lines around your time, energy and wellbeing.

If “no” feels like a stretch, start with something small. For instance, if a colleague comes to ask you a question whilst you are on task, you can say, “I’m sorry, I’m in the middle of something right now. I’ll come talk to you once I am finished.”

The beauty of these tips lies in their simplicity. However, it is a challenge to do them alone. Habits are difficult to break down and change. It’s easier with someone alongside you who gets the pressures of teaching and understands how you feel.

Nevertheless, these tips will make a difference to your relationship with teaching. They will help you to reduce the hate, the resentment and guilt and instead, amplify the enjoyment, vitality and enthusiasm that you once had for teaching. And your life beyond the classroom too.

Gemma Drinkall is an Educational Wellbeing Coach dedicated to helping middle leaders in education to create clear boundaries so that they can thrive in teaching.

Discover 5 steps that you can take today to help you switch off from teaching and switch on in your life. Download your free guide here.