Are You Lonely?

Are You Lonely?

?At the end of May, I moved into my new home just below the Austin Airport.

For the past year and a half, I have lived 10 minutes from downtown. Now, I am 30 minutes away, which is a small price to pay to be able to own a home that was bigger than the condo I was renting.

My home is in a new development, and the area is in the process of catching up with new residents, as nearby grocery and retail stores arrive.

Tesla built their new plant 10 minutes from here, which is driving growth in an area that had been undeveloped farmland.

Recently, I was able to drive 5 minutes from my home to the Circuit of the Americas to see the Van Gogh exhibit.

The exhibit shows many of the letters Van Gogh wrote to his brother Theo about his loneliness. He had the belief that his choice was to be creative and lonely or have friends and lose his creativity.

What if we don't have to choose between friendship and success?

Do we need to surround ourselves with people to feel connected? Or do we need to isolate ourselves in order to be focused?

When I had a few friends over to visit me in my new home, they asked me if I was?lonely. They live in the heart of downtown Austin so the contrast was huge for them as my neighborhood does not have many people living here yet.

It never occurred to me to feel?lonely?here. In the past, I have been to many parties, both work-related and personal, filled with people, and I?still?had moments of feeling isolated and?lonely.

As a professional keynote speaker, I have spent many nights alone in hotel rooms. That can wear on me as I am away from my friends, routine, and my dog, Pepe!

What if the fear of?loneliness?keeps us from taking risks?

It was a risk for me to leave LA after 30 years to move to Austin where I did not know many people. Here is my talk??"Life is an adventure,"?where I discuss my recent move.

It was a risk to leave my rented condo that was located in the heart of Austin.

At the end of the day, I think we should take the risk of feeling?lonely?to keep growing. I do not feel we have to give up friendships as the price of success.

Freddie Ravel

Keynote Speaker, Pianist & Grammy Nominated Artist bridging music, business and inspiration to empower leaders worldwide ????

3 年

???? Awesome share John! I do my best to manage my alone time with the same excitement of my people time. The first being self-reflection the second being co-elevation of one another. Like you John, after touring 83 countries and counting, I've seen lots of hotel rooms...and journaling/writing/composing and exercise kept me from feeling too lonely.

Jamie Mason Cohen

International Keynote Speaker | Communication Trainer for Fortune 500 Companies | The Leadership Standard Podcast Host | TEDx Leadership Talk = 2.4 million views

3 年

This is an intriguing and original question on whether we need to be alone to do our best creative work or not? Do friends help or hinder creative growth? Your personal take on it and the vulnerability in addressing it is inspiring to me. Also, the Van Gogh brother exchange brings it some fascinating creative historical context.

?Shep Hyken

Customer Service and Customer Experience Expert | Keynote Speaker | NYT Bestselling Author | Shep helps companies deliver AMAZING customer service experiences!

3 年

I'm reminded of the song lyrics of Three Dog Night that start out as, "One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do." Although my wife likes it when I leave town for a speaking gig. Gives her the "alone time" she needs (and has been craving through COVID). I face fears and concerns head-on. If it bothered me to be alone, yet there was nothing that I could do about it, then I would find a way to make the best of the situation. That simple. That's the way I handle most situations that bother me.

Sterling Hawkins

Best-Selling Author | Globally Recognized Growth Keynote Speaker | Award-Winning Thought Leader | 1M+ No Matter What Movement

3 年

Anything new takes risking the old. I’m with you, it’s time to feel the fear and step into a new story #NoMatterWhat!

Don Yaeger

Hall of Fame Speaker | 12X NY Times Bestselling Author | Helping leaders enhance team culture, performance, and storytelling through strategies I've distilled from the world's greatest athletes, coaches, and executives.

3 年

Very true. One piece of becoming a better teammate is not about the Benjamins—in other words, if you choose money over team, you’re going to end up very lonely, just as if you choose fame or acclaim!

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