Are You Listening?

When I was younger my Dad would tell me and my brother “God gave us two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.”??I remember thinking about what he said…??I thought, that is amazing.?I later found out he was requoting something he had heard.?The philosopher Epictetus is credited for saying “We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.”?This principle is important for a professional, not to just understand it, but to embrace it.

As consultants we need to listen carefully to our clients.?They will provide us with the information we need to perform our jobs.?Especially with requirement gatherings and most importantly, when they give us feedback.

In order for us to be effective communicators, we need to be effective listeners.

Stephen Covey, in his book, 7 Habits of Highly Successful People, wrote “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”

In my Consulting Skills course, in the communication module, I teach consultants to be more assertive when it comes to gathering information from their clients.?If a process or requirement is not clear, a quick phrase they can use is “Help me understand that a little bit more.”

Also, in my conflict resolution module, when a client becomes upset, I reference a similar tactic.?We need to understand the client's point of view.?In the process of the client expressing their frustrations or point of view, they go through the process of venting.?They get the opportunity to be heard.?Once they have spoken, we can then start the process of expressing our point of view.?In many cases, this becomes a great way to persuade the client to see the bigger picture and possibly win their trust with our ideas.

The key here is to become an effective communicator. ?Once you become an effective communicator, you will become a project leader.?The first step is to become an effective listener.

So, listen twice as much as you speak.?

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