Are You a Leader? Shut Up Already.

With twenty years of running retail buildings behind me, I've met many leaders who like to hear themselves talk.

It's okay. I've been there too. There's only so much time in a day, and you race from one person to another, trying to download information to every team member.

On to the next!

My former retail teams may not even recognize me outside of the building because, in my personal life, I'm not chatty. However, this enhances my leadership skills.

Here's how.

Trying to Keep Up with Talkers is Tiring

When I appear quiet, it's because my mind is loud. I'm trying to file my thoughts away, so I don't lose them later. I'm tracking threads of different color thoughts floating through my brain.

I often pause when answering questions. It's because of the colorful floating thread thoughts.

Growing up, I was surrounded by people that liked to talk; I let them talk. Trying to keep up was exhausting, and I'd often give up when I got interrupted.

I know how easy it is to give up on a conversation, so when I'm talking to a team, I pay attention to the space I give another person to answer a question. I intentionally give them as much time as needed for a reply.

Wait time

In education, "wait time" is the time a teacher gives a student to answer a question.

When Mary Budd Rowe first studied this in the mid-seventies, teachers paused only one-and-a-half seconds after asking the question; some waited only a tenth of a second.

No instructor waited more than two seconds.

Reminder, this was in the '70s before everyone had a mini-computer in their pockets. This was before the internet, people. Teachers gave almost no wait time in the '70s.

Rowe doubled the wait time and saw positive changes.

It's no surprise that when people get more time, they feel encouraged to speak.

People feel respected and cared for when they get space to respond.

It's as good for you as it is for them.

When I led teams, I allowed people to voice their opinions and ask questions. It was deliberate. It takes practice and determination to wait for an answer. When we allow time for our team members to think and discuss, we also allow ourselves to be open to new ideas.

It's as good for you as it is for them.

Practicing patience with your team is essential. I'd always encourage my team to talk to me as much as I speak to them. (I know I don't want to hear my voice all day). I want to listen to what they say and meet them where they are so we can move forward as a team.

Create that space for them.

The Team Will Feel the Wait Time

As technology advances, our patience grows shorter.

Our sense of time can get warped. Three seconds can feel like an hour. It's weird. If you've ever experienced the pressure of impatience, you know what I mean.

If you've ever been talked over, interrupted, or ignored, you know what I mean.

I created wait time within my teams when I led stores. My team didn't know what I was doing, but they felt it. They were confident, engaged, and motivated. Practice this in your stores, and you'll create a positive effect that permeates the team.

Respect mirrors respect.

Just watch.

Hey, I’m Kit. I spent 20 years leading retail teams and I now write about retail, Web3, leadership, and entrepreneurship.?

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