Are you a human being or becoming?

It all happened on one sunny spring day, somewhere on the Mediterranean coast, where a young ant who lived happened to grow up in the same neighborhood of a blossoming fig tree with a caterpillar (silkworm as they like to be called).

They crossed paths several times during the day, minding their own foraging business, and eventually, the curious young spirits that they are, they became conversation buddies, especially when they took their breaks in the shade, or nibbled on the same ripe juicy fig.

After a while, as they were ready to go beyond the small talk of the weather, the location of the latest ripe fig, or the latest victims to the birds in the area, the caterpillar felt comfortable presenting her stoic meandering and asked the ant: "What are your aspirations in life? What do you want to be?"

The ant responded: "Well, I never really thought about that, I am an ant, so I guess I will continue to be an ant and do what ants do; be always busy during the warm days, follow the swarm trail, build the colony, work on my muscle strength to be able to carry 5 times my weight, and live long till 30, I guess. Nothing spectacular, I am an ant and I will continue to BE an ant. What about you?”

The caterpillar felt baffled that the ant aspired to remain an ant and she herself said: "Well, I do not intend to be a worm for the rest of my life. I like to think of myself as work in progress, a constant metamorphosis, you might say. At some point, I would like to build my own cocoon and dwell inside it and explore solitude and distance from the daily hassles of life. Once I am ready, I would like to grow some wings and explore life from a different perspective, rather than crawling on the floor, I'd like to see things from above, to be free as a bird (rather than be eaten by a bird). I want to be full of colors and jump from one flower to the other. I think I will be bored being one thing or in one state for the rest of my life, every few years or so, I need a transformation, I need to BECOME something else."

As the ant was hearing all this, you could see her eyes fixated and her jaw dropped, as if she was watching a Sci-Fi movie, and as soon as the caterpillar reached a point of silence, the ant responded: "You're such a dreamer! I have never heard of a worm that flies!"

The caterpillar responded: "You'll see. One day I will wave at you from the air. You remember this conversation!"

As I was standing below this fig tree, listening to this conversation, I couldn't but laugh, and at the same time reflect upon my own life on the topic of Being vs BECOMING.

For most of my life, I have lived it as if I am Becoming, always a work in progress, always striving for the next version of myself, almost often feeling as if I am in a race with time, rushed to reach the next level, the next phase.

It was only in my early thirties that I realized the detriment of this constant endeavor to become, and rarely ever stopped to enjoy the current moment, the current state, and to simply be. And it wasn't until my mid-thirties that I actually learned how to be, upon practicing more and more meditation and mindfulness techniques.

This is when I started to value the power of slowing down, of not so much looking at how far I have gone, not how long the road ahead might be towards where I am going, but literally to look around where I am, who I am, and to simply be in that moment, appreciate who I am and what I have and who I am with in that moment in life.

As I come close to tying the knot on my thirties, and after a few much-appreciated and valued upsets, I notice that I am drifting again to the fast pace, the strive to become, to accomplish, to reach for, as the forties remind me of all the unattained goals, dreams, and aspirations.

(I know all of you in your forties and older will tell me that I still have plenty of time, but let me be in the moment for now)

Yet, this time, I have been in the being mode before, and I know that I operate much better from that state of presence, so I need to remind myself that by being I am indeed becoming.

By being present, mindful, aware, I am becoming a much more attuned to myself, and others, which immensely enhances my relationship with myself and others.

By being in sync with my emotional and physical state, checking in with myself and what my needs are, and what are the needs of those round me, I am becoming a much better version of the human I want to be.

By being open and curious to what is emerging, by slowing down to notice, listen, and observe, I am becoming much more in sync my higher self, and with the visions and messages I need to receive to fulfill my calling and serve my soul's purpose.

Yet, this spiritual reconciliation between my being and becoming does not seem to really sync in on most days, as I find myself shifting from one meeting to another, one client to the next, and always planning the next step, whether for my personal or professional life.

From a philosophical point of view, Heraclitus and Parmenides, along with their proponents, have endlessly debated "being vs becoming". In any given moment, I am, yet the next moment I have become someone else, similar to the wisdom inherent in the saying “No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man.” ― Heraclitus.

Being is instantaneous, I can only be at a particular moment, and it is a conscious effort to be present and aware moment after moment after moment, yet I am constantly becoming, whether I am aware of it or not, consciously seeking it or not.

So philosophically, it is an endless debate, where I see both points of view to be true, so I return to my essence and what I am seeking.

I find myself longing for more being at this phase of my life, to be present, to be grounded and centered, and as I sit and meditate one day on this, I realize that what I actually value and appreciate the becoming I am experiencing over time, and what I want to operate less from is the state of doing.

I don't want to be constantly looking for something to do, to fill my time for the mere illusion of productivity and efficiency. I don't even want to do the relaxing, numbing activities that my mind convinces me are the opposite of the busy doing.

Of course, I still have a lot of goals and ambitions, ones that require hard work and serious doing that is required for the becoming I seek for myself, however I want to do it from a state of being, of alignment with my inner calling and higher self; of consciousness and awareness rather than unconscious patterns developed out of fear, or insecurity, or dissociation from my true needs.

(This article took a while to finish as I was really exploring those concepts, and how I would truly and practically live them)

At this point of my exploration, something was still missing, something did not sit well. I realized that there was still judgment in my approach, whether to the becoming or the doing, for I was still shunning them to a certain degree, and a true state of being should value and appreciate, rather than judge.

So how do I be, without being in a state of doing, and without putting the energy into the becoming?

First, I need to see the value of each one of those states and how they can serve me and stand in my way, so I have to define them by how I want to practice them.

1. Being is, in essence, being in presence and awareness of my core, my true self in the moment. It encompasses the idea of observing myself, being mindful of what is me/not me, what is mine/not mine, and a being connected to the eternal or divine. Being is about embracing the present moment, accepting myself as I am, and cultivating inner peace and stillness. It is a practice and a commitment, rather than an outcome. In essence, I find it best described as observing and witnessing of the blossoming buds, the flowering, the ripening of the fruits, and the falling of the dry leaves.
2. Becoming: is my journey of personal growth, transformation, and self-realization. It involves transcending limitations, overcoming egoic patterns, and aligning myself with my higher self and what is emerging from my being. Becoming is about evolving spiritually, emotionally, and mentally towards a more enlightened or awakened state of consciousness. It's a process of unfolding, learning, and expanding my awareness of the interconnectedness of all things. Becoming is a "result of", a byproduct, that I can attain rather than dictate and control. In essence, I find it best described as the actual blossoming, flowering, fruit-bearing, and decaying; the evolution and growth of the plant season after season.
3. Doing refers to the actions and behaviors that arise from being and becoming. While being and becoming emphasize inner states of consciousness and personal transformation, doing relates to the outward expression of those states in the world. Doing encompasses the practical aspects of life, such as work, service, relationships, and creative expression. It involves living in alignment with my values, intentions, and spiritual aspirations, and engaging in actions that contribute to the greater good. Doing, in essence, is the pruning, trimming, watering, adding the necessary vitamins and ensuring the right conditions for the becoming to unfold, and the right doing emerges from the proper state of being.

Now, this definition and realization sit well with me, and the essence now lies in finding the right balance between any of those states, depending on the season, and most importantly the alignment between them.

So how do I want to live the being, doing, and becoming?

1. Mindfulness Meditation: Engage in regular mindfulness meditation practices to develop present-moment awareness. Simply sit quietly, observe my breath, and allow thoughts, emotions, and sensations to arise without judgment. This helps me anchor myself in the present moment and cultivate a sense of being.
2. Body Sync Practices: Practice conscious breathing exercises to center myself in the present moment. Connect consciously with my body and let it guide my movement, be it while dancing, or stretching, or sitting, or walking. Be more present in the moment, through my body.
3. Nature Immersion: Spend time in nature and immerse myself in its beauty. Observe the sights, sounds, and sensations around me without distractions. Nature has a way of grounding me and slowing me down in the present moment and reminding me of my interconnectedness with all living beings.
4. Self-Reflection: Set aside time for self-reflection and introspection. Journaling, contemplative practices, or quiet moments of reflection help me deepen my understanding of myself and pour out on paper thoughts and feelings that I may be repressing around others.
5. Letting Go of Attachment: Practice letting go of attachment to outcomes and embracing the flow of life. Surrender to the present moment and trust in the unfolding of my journey without clinging to expectations or desires.
6. Connection with Others: Foster meaningful connections with others based on authenticity, compassion, and presence. Engage in deep listening and genuine communication, allowing yourself to be fully present with others.

So how do you practice being, doing, and becoming?

• Where do you find you spend most of your time, and is that how you would like to continue?
• If you look back 5-10 years, how has your doing shaped your becoming?
• What helps you be in the moment, and what actions do you do that enable you to become the higher, more evolved version you aspire to be in the future?

I invite you to take 10 minutes (and more, hopefully) to reflect upon those questions, maybe even spend time with yourself in the mirror this weekend.

Resources:

• Philosophize this episode #147 on the philosophical being vs becoming debate podcast
• Everything Belongs - The gift of contemplative prayer by Richard Rohr

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About ANMU

Ever since I was a kid, I asked a lot of questions, to the point that my teachers had to complain to my parents, thinking it was intentional to distract and grab attention. As I grew older, I realized that this is how I perceive life, through curiosity and questioning. Today, as a spiritual seeker who invites others to walk this path through my work, I use this space to invite you to ask yourself some of the questions I ask myself.

Through ANMU, I encourage you to gift yourself that time, to step out of the auto-pilot mode, and spend some time "listening" to the answers, to live the question.

To make the most out of ANMU, I suggest you:

• Treat this as a mental spa, try to dedicate 15-20 minutes to read through
• Shield your time from other distractions (phone, email, other screens)
• Sit with the question, perhaps in silence, perhaps with a pen and paper
• Live the question, and always come back to it