Are YOU a Freak Like Me?

I LOVE doing laundry!

Like LOOOOVVVVEEEE it!

??????

I am a freak that way ??

I get excited about sorting the clothes into matching colour piles.

Like…super giddy! ??????

First load goes into the washer…

Then the second…

The third…

The fourth…

All moving to the dryer or the drying rack after being thoroughly washed, rinsed & repeated.

And then…

Oh, and THEN!

I LOVE the smell of the clothes when I pull them out of the dryer all warm and delicious and smelling SO clean!

Shhhhh…a little secret…??

I have been known to bury my face in a great smelling sweatshirt or put on warm, fuzzy socks fresh out of the dryer to REALLY enjoy the sensation of clean laundry.

OBSESSED!!!

Have YOU ever done that?? ?(HIGHLY recommend it ??)

THEN…the fun continues!

Folding all the clothes and putting them away is heaven ??

When I am all done, I look around at the empty space where laundry used to lie in wait on the floor, the empty laundry baskets now begging for dirty clothes, and the empty washer & dryer exhausted from doing their duty, and I am overcome with such a deep sense of accomplishment and satisfaction ?

And JOY - pure, unadulterated JOY ??

Sometimes, I even do a little dance ????

See??? ?A FREAK!!

But, I don’t care.

I embrace my laundry obsession with great gusto!

There is a definite beginning, middle and end to doing laundry.

And THAT satisfies my joy of easy & fast processes, my satisfaction in a job completed & well-done, and my obsessive organizational nature.

Oh…and clean clothes ??????

So, ya, I am a BIT of a freak when it comes to doing laundry.

And, You?

What are YOU a freak over?

??????

But here’s the thing…

When I was deep in my grief over losing my son, not even laundry could get me out of bed.

Not the idea of how much joy & satisfaction I would get from doing laundry.

Not the idea of how accomplished I would feel.

Not the smell and feel of freshly washed clothes right out of the dryer.

I didn’t have the energy or the desire to do ANYTHING.

I was numb. ?I was devastated. ?I was exhausted.

And finding joy in anything seemed completely out of reach and something I wasn’t even in the market to entertain.

How could I possibly feel any joy whatsoever after my son had died???!!

So…

I chose to stay in my 2-week old, smelly, crusty PJs rather than wash and change into new ones…even though I KNEW how much better I would feel…well, at least that is what people told me.

I KNEW, somewhere in the recesses of my mind, that I would love the smell of freshly washed PJs and that they would feel SO good when I put them on…but I didn’t care.

I couldn’t…I just couldn’t.

The whole idea of doing laundry - even just one load - was exhausting and I would crawl back into bed, in my smelly, crusty, 2-week old PJs and try to tune out the world.

Have you ever felt that way?

??????

I can’t tell you when my joy of doing laundry came back.

But it did…over time.

Very slowly.

Starting as just being able to put through one load on automatic pilot without really paying attention - I did it because, quite literally, I had to.

Then, as time passed and life started to have colours again…first shades of greys, then pale colours, then more vibrant ones…joy slowly started seeping through the cracks of my grief.

Until one day, I found myself dancing around as I was sorting piles of clothes into like colours, burying my face in a freshly washed sweatshirt, and relishing the feeling of satisfaction and accomplishment I had when I was finished doing the laundry.

Moving forward with grief and finding your way back to joy is a process, one that takes as long as it takes.

I can’t tell you how long it will take - everyone’s journey has its own timeline.

What I can tell you is this…

Be kind and compassionate with yourself.

Be patient with yourself.

And know that, one day, when you aren’t even looking, you too will find yourself dancing while sorting piles of laundry and glimmers of joy will have seeped through the cracks of your grief.

When it shows up, let it be there.

YOU deserve to feel joy!

YOU deserve to be a freak like me!

YOU are worth it!

M. xo

P.S. If you are wanting support getting back to what freakiness brings you joy, I can help. Book a short call by sending me a message or email: [email protected] and let’s explore what coaching together might look like.