Are You in a Fatal Attraction?

You’re instantly drawn to each other. The relationship starts out very hot and heavy. You can't stop thinking about the other person. They're constantly in your head. You just want to be with them all the time.

Could this be your soulmate?

Or is this relationship something more toxic, what I call a fatal attraction?

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It can be hard to tell at first, but, with time, there will be signs––and, if they are warning you away, I’d like to help you recognize them sooner rather than later.

Because, the truth is, anyone is susceptible to falling into a fatal attraction relationship...even someone who has read the palms of more than 7,000 people and knows what to look for in the hand of a compatible partner!

After my marriage of nineteen years ended, I was blaming myself and in a vulnerable state. At another time in my life, I might have heeded the messages I saw in my new partner’s hands and realized that I needed to go slow and pay attention to signals that things weren’t as they should be. But, as we often do when we’re in need of love, companionship, and validation, I over-rode all of my instincts and fell into a two-year relationship that caused me additional anxiety, depression, and pain––exactly what I would love to help you avoid.

If I had been noticing, these are some of the signs of fatal attraction partners that might have appeared as red flags:

1. Verbal abuse: this might take the form of them calling you stupid or ugly, constantly belittling you, or criticizing your looks, personality, or your actions. During my relationship, I got my teeth straightened because my partner harped incessantly about how crooked they were and how large my nose was.
2. Physical abuse: Physical abuse is any intentional act that causes injury or trauma to another person by means of bodily contact, and it should never be tolerated. According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, on average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. During one year, this equates to more than 10 million women and men. As clear as we might assume this to be, there are people who do not realize they are in a physically abusive relationship, and it can be very difficult to leave this kind of relationship even by people who do recognize it for what it is. The bottom line is, if you are feeling unsafe in a relationship where you should feel loved and secure, you need to get out. Suggestions for finding help include: calling the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, talking with a therapist, reaching out to a local battered women’s shelter, and finding books and online communities that can help you evaluate your situation, increase your self-esteem, and make a plan.
3. Always having to “save” the other person, giving and giving while they only take and do nothing to change their behavior. You may see the potential in your partner and want to help them reach it, but if they aren’t doing any of the work to change, the situation is not healthy.
4. Magnetic Reversals, where the other person alternately works to attract you and then repel you, keeping you continually guessing about where you stand. Days of constant intimacy can be followed by weeks of waiting by the phone.
5. “Forgetting” about plans you’ve been discussing for weeks.
6. Wanting to sleep with others, potentially inappropriate, partners.
7. Insensitivity to your feelings.
8. Did you recognize your relationship in any of those?

If so, you aren’t alone, and you need to know there’s nothing wrong with you! As I said, we’re all susceptible to situations like this.

But why do we get into these fatal attraction relationships in the first place? Why would we create something that's so painful and so horrible?

Because the universe is trying to teach us something we need to learn in order to be ready to attract a true, soulmate connection. And when we recognize that, everything changes, I promise.

What we’re learning from quantum physics is that we live in a participatory universe, meaning we actually co-create our reality––which also means we are co-creating this relationship. That means we can't blame our partner completely for this bad behavior, even though we’d like to. And trust me, that's the easiest thing to do, right? “It's all his fault.” “It's all her fault.”

However, if we’re going to grow and be able to attract and maintain a deeply loving soulmate relationship, we need to stop thinking like that. We need to retrain the way we think because, as hard as it may be to hear, we are actually responsible for everything in our lives.

Which is not to say we should blame ourselves! We are leaving the blame game behind altogether because it’s not helpful. What we want to do is recognize that we have subconscious influences that affect everything going on inside of us and outside of us. Being gentle with ourselves is the only way to move on to a new, lasting love.

Unfortunately, we are most likely to attract a fatal attraction relationship when we are at our most vulnerable when we’ve recently ended another relationship, are feeling like a failure, or are in despair.

At this point, you may suddenly decide you don't believe love exists. You don't believe it can work for you. You go into a tailspin and you definitely are not able to give and receive love. One of the saddest things I find people doing is they just give up on love altogether and they say, “Forget it. I don't need love in my life. I can do this all by myself.” And the truth is, you can get through life by yourself. If that's what you really want, then great. But if it's not, don't give up on love, because love does exist for you!

So what do we do instead? How do we do the work we need to do to learn love’s lessons?

To attract a soulmate relationship, we actually need to believe the following things about the universe and about ourselves:

• Love exists. It may not be obvious, but if you don't believe in love, you're not going to attract love, right? This can’t be a matter of “I’ll believe it when I see it.” You have to believe in love first before you can call it in.

• Love exists for me. You have to know that you can attract love, no matter what your track record has been, and that love exists for you. Trusting that you are worthy of love and that someone will see you will go a long way in showing the universe you are ready for a soulmate connection.

Once you have those beliefs in place, you need to be able to do these two things:

• Both give and receive love. Giving love feels great, but when you’re the only one giving, you’re probably not being appreciated by your partner the way you should be. When I was in that fatal attraction relationship, I thought, “Oh, if I just give him more and more and more, he's going to love me more, and he's finally going to commit to me.” But that didn't happen. In fact, it pushed him away.

• Love and respect yourself enough to say no to all that is not love. This can be a challenge because it means you have to first recognize that what you’re experiencing is not love. That means paying attention to the red flags I mentioned above and having the courage to accept that this relationship is not bringing you what you need, and that you need to release it before you will find real love. Sometimes it takes the observation of a friend or family member to help you see that you need to seek love elsewhere.

But, the exciting news is that your hands actually tell you (if you’re willing to listen better than I was) who your fatal attraction might be, just as they tell you information about your soulmate. Would you love more detail click here for more https://bit.ly/2Uywl3f

The example I want to share here is the hand of a Hermit archetype, which you can identify by the square, wide palm and short fingers––with the exception of a long little finger, which we call the mercury finger. Hermits are very intelligent people. They tend to keep things to themselves, so you almost have to pull information out of them. Their best match is what we call the Dreamer archetype, someone with long fingers; a long, rectangular palm; and a strong ring finger.

Conversely, the Hermit’s fatal attraction is going to be one called the Wheel of Fortune, someone with short fingers; a long, rectangular palm; and a strong Apollo finger. The Wheel of Fortune is a very charismatic, and also very common, archetype. So while the Hermit can be easily attracted to the Wheel of Fortune, they are not going to relate well emotionally to this type of person. You can actually see in their hands the potential problems that may arise as the relationship gets going. If I were reading the hands of a Hermit and a Wheel of Fortune together, I would recommend they take the relationship slowly, with their eyes wide open, and try to figure out if they can work through the potential challenges.

If you have the opportunity to connect with somebody who is more in alignment with you naturally, then that's what I would recommend. We need to keep in mind that our hand shapes form by the age of six, and, since we are mostly operating with our subconscious mind and absorbing everything around us in those early years, our hands are reflecting early, subconscious influences that affect our personality, our relationships, how we look at the world, and ultimately how we create our world. It affects everything. So knowing what these influences are, what your hands tell you, can actually help you make better decisions about your relationships.

If you're single, whether you are in a fatal attraction relationship or you just want to find your soulmate, I recommend you set this new intention for yourself: 

"I release toxic relationships and choose to create a soulmate relationship."

For maximum effectiveness, write it down and read it daily, because it will support you in letting go of what is not love, thereby creating room to bring in real love. That's what I want for you: something meaningful, something long-lasting, and something that makes you feel expansive. Soulmate love is very expansive and it supports you in all that you are, so you don't have to apologize, you know, for your nose or whatever. You can just be you. And that's more than enough.

Cynthia Clark is a Palm Reading Expert and Love Compatibility Coach with Loveinyourhands.com. Want to know if you’re blocking true love from your life? Cynthia is now offering a Heart Chamber Analysis Report where she will analyze ten areas in your own hands to determine what may be blocking you. The report includes ways to open and balance your heart chambers. Go to: https://www.worldofhands.com/?page_id=1603 to get started!