You are enough as a working mom.

I'm coming up on one-year of breastfeeding and pumping with my third child, Alexander. I'm proud of this milestone but what I want to share with #workingmoms is that breastfeeding and pumping do not come with a warm embrace, wrap-around support, or anyone cheering you on. And through my motherhood journey from feeding all three of my kids in some combination form of breastfeeding and formula feeding, I've learned and seen that if you feed with formula, many moms are happier too. Breastfeeding/pumping is exhausting on a daily basis.

I remember seeing this quote fly by and how validating that was to me this year.

We got there. Mom and Alexander have been breastfeeding and pumping as we approach his first birthday on January 30th. But what does that mean for us in terms of outside of that? I've often asked myself that question many times throughout the journey of it. At what cost? While on one hand you're nourishing your child, there is also a physical, mental, and emotional toll that it takes on you.

There's only so much to give in all the parts of our life. Your capacity becomes tested as you grow your family. There are five things I learned that got me to be able to continue this journey with a bit more ease, grace, and compassion for the journey.

1. I am a small business owner and I work remotely primarily. I nursed and pumped this year in the comfort of my home. (no more schlepping 5,000 bags) on the commuter train into Boston to my workplace.
2. I have the autonomy of my schedule. I pumped a few times a day and did not have to set up my whole brain to go to another building and "get set up" for my 20-30 minutes doing so then rushing back to my desk until the next "pump session."
3. Third child, more grace. This time around, I went in with the mentality that I'd like to breastfeed and I was ok if I did not produce enough. Because I am enough. I used formula as needed at the 5-month mark and we still were going strong. That invitation for support and ease worked for me. It's not nearly talked about enough, combination feeding.
4. I will check in with myself to see how my mental health is as I move along, not to create a hard deadline or goal on this path. This worked for me. I didn't need a goal this time and if Alex was happy and I was doing well, then we'd continue. If not, I'd breathe in some more support for myself.
5. Being a business owner and nursing/pumping for a full year is a huge undertaking physically, emotionally, and for your family (I have two other kids as well). Nursing and pumping do affect your other family members. Life is busy with littles and I decided I'd be tied to nursing or pumping. They hung in there with me but there are a lot of moving parts (literally).

So I'm not a numbers person but that quote stuck with me because 1800 hours as it relates to a full time job is a full time job. It's a huge amount of time and commitment that I put into choosing breastfeeding. And, #workingmoms whether you are at home, working outside the home, in between, in transition, or figuring things out, you're still putting in fifteen-hour days. We often don't breathe much forgiveness into our lives. We live so much in "productive" and "doing" mode because it is so much of what's around us. We feel it's just expected of us.

As a coach, I help my clients breathe in more compassion and space into themselves and their families so they can align a formula that meets their unique needs and their families on their terms. It can be simple practices and accessible to you. We don't have to run away or escape to find true wellbeing in our daily lives. Sometimes we just need to re-focus the lens so we know what to prioritize in this season. As a young parent, you may be living several seasons doing simple rituals and things to support yourself and your family. Over time, you will see the impact of those simple practices and your wellbeing.

I want all overwhelmed and drained moms to master the full-time formula with part-time effort. As a mom of three, the middle child, & a recovering pleaser, I believe we all can go from being on the hamster wheel to being happy with grace. It may hurt a little in the process but personal growth is never easy. Life is messy and uncomfortable on the parenting journey. So if you're growing your family and things are messy, you are enough. Keep sharing that with yourself.

Keep adding support, love, and compassion for this phase of life you're in. There are many seasons in parenthood and this one takes a huge amount of your physical, mental, emotional health. It affects your career choices and relationships in the short term and the long term.

But, I truly believe when you find unapologetic success on your terms and a purpose that fills you in some capacity, it's never about the amount you pumped or produced. It's about being happy. Fulfilled. And enough.

You are enough mama. If you feel like you're somewhere in the messy middle of life and career, burning the candle at both ends and drained on the daily, follow me here.

I’m Christine Anastasia, Master Certified Life Coach, Ed.M. I work with overwhelmed and drained moms master the full-time formula with part-time effort. I help you go from hamster wheel to happy with grace. Life is messy in the middle. Need holistic support, not a bandaid?

Join my community of #workingmoms!