ARE YOU EMOTIONALLY INTELLIGENT?

By Dr Dalip Singh IAS, PhD (Psychology)

My Interview on Emotional Intelligence on a TV Channel;

1. What is Emotional Intelligence?

DALIP SINGH: EI means your emotional make up. How well you are able to handle yourself and people around you. Like love, happiness, fear, hate, shame, disgust, sadness, anger etc are some of the emotions which directly affect your life. To be successful in your professional life or personal life you need to learn to use your emotions to your advantage.

2. How do you differentiate between EQ and IQ?

DALIP SINGH: IQ is the level of your academic intelligence: such exams passed, marks obtained, your degrees, intellectual credentials. Qualifying for IAS, IPS, doctor, engineering, computer science or in some top exam. All these are intelligence of academic variety. EQ is how smart are you outside the classroom or when you are faced with difficult situations in life. Here you do not need IQ but need different kind of intelligence, which psychologists call EI or EQ now. Psychologists have concluded after research that IQ accounts for only 20 % in a person’s success in life. The rest 80 % success is attributed to EQ

3. Emotional intelligence has been included as a subject in the UPSC CIVIL SERVICES examination in India. What do you think that Government is looking for?

DALIP SINGH: Yes. EI has been included in General Studies paper IV in main examination of UPSC. Hence, any young boy or girl appearing for services like IAS IPS IFS IRS etc should be clear about the concept of EI. The GOI is looking for people who have emotional skills to deal with complex administrative situations.

4. What emotional skills do you think civil servants should have to be a star performer?

DALIP SINGH:: Emotional life is difficult to handle. We all experience high and low in life. Balance is the key. By using emotional intelligence we can escape moods/feelings/emotions that create problems for us.

Examples:

·     Can you activate yourself when you are down

·     Can you calm down when you are over activated

·     Can you recognize the threshold of an emotion or control how long it will last

An EI civil servant will require some emotional skills to help manage the emotions: Such as:

1.   Learn to recognize your emotions- If you are able to recognize your emotion you will also be able to manage them. Recognize your emotions-emotions of people around you, your boos, your subordinates etc. (Example ANGER)

2.  Learn to empathize with others-Empathy is the ability to sense how other people feel. To care for others. Poor/downtrodden/ Sc/ST/Rural people/women/children

3.  Develop high self esteem-How do you feel about yourself. HIGH self esteem means Self confidence, respect, being wanted, being cared for, being appreciated etc. LOW self esteem means alone, bitter, criticized, defeat, guilty, helpless etc (Know your market value)

4.  Manage emotional upsets-like stress, depression, conflict, anxiety, tension, upsets

5.  Learn the art of influencing others-Be an emotional winner- and not loser. None of us are 100 percent winners or losers. It’s a matter of degree. The art of influencing people can make you a star performer or a disastrous failure.

6.  Manage your anger- To be angry is natural. But anger needs to be managed. Anger kills, shortens life span, lead to strokes, high blood pressure, depressions etc. so manage your anger before it takes you over. There is no such thing as uncontrolled anger.

5. Are you advocating that IAS or IPS or IRS officers with high EQ are better administrators.

DALIP SINGH: I will tell you the story of two IAS officers namely RAVI and SUNIL: Both had joined IAS, had identical training at LBSNAA, both had good ranking in school and colleges, universities, both qualified UPSC in the same batch. However the moment they joined service all similarity disappeared.

RAVI: Arrogant, he would put people off, remained busy with his computer, was not social, was not a team leader and believed in technical details everywhere. He got transferred every 6 months and would blame the system, his annual confidential reports (ACRs) or performance appraisal was poor. (low EI)

SUNIL: On the other hand was adept interpersonally, everyone liked him, he was empathetic to subordinates, was a helping hand, enthusiastic and would take additional responsibilities, a team leader, his superiors rated him high. (High EI)

5. What do you suggest a young UPSC aspirant to read?

DALIP SINGH: My book on Emotional Intelligence at work – 4th edition-published by SAGE Publications-translated in English, Hindi, Tamil, Marathi and Chinese

6. Do you suggest any websites etc on Internet. How does one measure EQ. Is there any Emotional Intelligence rest

DALIP SINGH: Visit my site www.eqindia.com to know more about EQ. You can also try free online EQ TEST and know your EQ level online.