If you don’t like what I’m doing that’s your problem

Every weekday morning, I get up at 4:15 am, drink coffee, splash cold water on my face and head in the freezing cold, barely awake, to complete an (at the time) unappealing exercise routine, known as CrossFit. Normally these mornings are uneventful (expect for everyone dying during burpees) but this morning a fellow gym goer said, “If you don’t like what I’m doing that’s your problem.” So, I felt compelled to write about this.

I think there are a couple ways to take this, but I am heading in the direction of self-realization. ?So, shooting from my own perspective and the realization that comparison had as Teddy Roosevelt put it “stole my joy” for so long. This comment, my fellow gym goer made, really resonated with me. And for two important reasons: 1.) Comparison and judgement are the thieves of joy and 2.) I need to focus on my goals and not what everyone else is doing.

Let me start with the first reason, as in the past I used to (unknowingly/subconsciously) constantly compare myself to others based on their belongings. And not just compare but judge them without knowing them only because I wanted what they had. Now, I grew up very poor, (like stand over the heater poor) so there was always a want. Someone always had something nicer, cleaner, bigger, or more expensive. I’d finally save up money to compete, go buy the thing, and that thing was already last year’s model. Drove me crazy! So, I would say negative things about them. I didn’t even know these people well. Until I realized that the only reason I was acting so foolishly was because I wanted what they had and that seems silly.

The second reason resonated after I had a self-realization on the first. I don’t want these items in all reality, so what is it that I want? What is going to be self-fulling to me? And as it turns out, it’s not things at all. It was the success these individuals had that allowed them to purchase such items or have such things. So, I learned that the only comparison I should be making is how well I am doing and if I get judged for it, just as I used to judge others, that’s their problem, because my own success is just that “my problem!” If I fail, that’s my problem. If I don’t learn from my failures, also my problem!

This is why it’s so important for good leadership in organizations to recognize potential in their staff. To teach and build those under you for the same success. This helps eliminate the unnecessary judgement of others due to diminished self-worth. Those looking for success are looking for the healthiest version of self-comparison, Role Models! And the insurance industry needs these role models because of the amount of youth coming in looking for success. It’s easy for them to make a negative self-comparison seeing successful people and things all around them and being at the start of their career. So, if you don’t like what I’m doing, use those comparisons as a mirror, because it’s a reflection of something you’re unwilling to admit you’re lacking, and that’s your problem.

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