NO, YOU DON’T LIKE MARTINIS

Warning – This weeks blog is heavily geared towards Californians

Californians LOVE their vodka martinis…except they really don’t. In California where we happen to bartend, there seems to be a war raging, a war on vermouth! Merriam-Webster defines the Martini as a cocktail made of gin and dry vermouth. Yet, every time I bartend, and I do mean EVERY TIME, the following conversation takes place.

Customer: “I’ll take a vodka martini with a twist.”

Me: “Great, any preference on your vodka?”

Customer: “No, all tastes the same to me.”

Me: “Fantastic. How much vermouth do you prefer in your martini?”

Customer: “OMG! GROSS! I HATE VERMOUTH! KEEP THAT BOTTLE 6FT AWAY FROM ME AT ALL TIMES! I NEED TO SPEAK TO YOUR MANAGER! AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

What the above customer really wanted, was chilled vodka served in a martini glass. While there are several ways to properly communicate this drink order, saying that you want a martini with no vermouth is not one of them. You might as well order a margarita with no lime juice, or a mojito with no mint while you’re at it. Now, I’m not here to tell anyone what they should or should not drink. You are not required to like vermouth. After all, one of the beautiful things about imbibe culture is that at the end of the day, you have the right to have whatever drink you want, made whatever way you want it, and not be judged for it. (Except for that one guy who ordered a Black Russian with 2 olives IN THE DRINK. You sir, I will judge until the end of time) No, today’s blog is simply about educating you on the proper lingo of your drink order.

Saying you want a drink ‘up’ means it will come in a glass that has a stem. More often than not this will be a martini glass. However, depending on the bar, your bartender might also put your vodka into a coupe glass. If you feel passionate about your stem glassware, just specify ‘martini glass’ instead of saying ‘up’. This is perfectly acceptable.

While we are on the topic of vermouth, I always thought it was strange that there is such a stigma against dry vermouth here in California. While sweet vermouths and amaros don’t seem to have the same problem here, the golden state certainly seems to have it out for dry vermouth. You would think that the birthplace of California style pizza (AKA put whatever the hell you want on this piece of dough) and the wine capital of the USA (vermouth is 75% wine) would like the complexity that this aperitive offers, but I digress.

I will leave you, dear reader, with one last suggestion before I get off my soapbox. If you don’t care for dry vermouth, try a ‘Bianco’ vermouth. In the last few years, Bianco vermouth has become a lot more readily available. This vermouth loses the dryness, and peppery flavor, and replaces it with more sweetness and herbs. It won’t stick out as much in your vodka/gin ‘Martini’, or whatever it is that you drink…

-Sam

Twist & Bitters

Remember, if you need help with private bartending for your event, or setting up your own bar, just email us at [email protected]. We would be more than happy to give you some pointers. 

 For great recipes and updates, you can also check out our Instagram.