You Don't Have to try so Hard to Sell. Burn Your Sales Scripts and Read This!

It was Christmas Eve, and I had just spent the afternoon at the mall purchasing last minute Xmas gifts and soaking in the Christmas cheer listening to carols being piped throughout the mall. I also enjoyed seeing children delight in meeting Father Xmas and having their photos taken with him.

It was imperative that I feel some festive season cheer as I was currently living in a temporary home with a Jewish family. Hanukkah was in full force the week of Christmas, and despite there being signs of traditional Christmas fare, there was still the feeling of celebrations, excitement, and gratitude for things gone and things to come.

As I exited the mall, I noticed Crate and Barrel and thought of one more gift to purchase for a loved one. When I entered the store, it was dead as everyone was at the mall shopping, and this store was in a building separate from the mall.

A lovely man greeted me by the name of Stephen, an interior designer, for the store. He offered his support; however, I informed him I was looking around and proceeded to shop with my eyes with the exquisite couches, bedroom settings, and soft furnishings.

I found a couch, sat down, and then remembered to ring my family as it was Christmas already in Australia. Tears of sadness flowed as I witnessed my nieces and nephews, opening their presents on Facetime. For a moment, I longed to back in Australia, rather than Crate and Barrel.

As I proceed to leave the store, Stephen approached me and enquired about my welfare. He had noticed me sitting on one of their sofas, wiping my tears, as I used my iPhone. I let him know of my background and the purpose of my call. He continued to ask more questions, and a delightful conversation ensued, with mutual collaboration. It was so lovely to be seen, heard, and appreciated. At that moment, I realize how much I was dying for connection, and he was able to provide it. He let go of his hidden agenda to make a sale and was there for me.

Our conversation ended with a hug, and I walked away with my heart filled with joy because this salesperson had decided to ditch his sales script. He delivered the best Xmas present Santa could have ever provided, and that was a connection. I left, wanting to return and buy the whole bloody store because of his approach. He instilled confidence in me that he was someone who cared and made me realize that customers don’t mind paying top dollar if you take the time to show your care.

With the busy world we live in, customers today are dying for human connection. With online shopping taking over, the opportunity to connect is getting less and less. Luckily, Apple hasn’t yet invented an App that can look deeply into your eyes, deliver appropriate body language with gestures, and smiles and comfort you with soothing words; however, watch the space it may be one here already! Most salespeople forget the importance and impact of human connection. It is becoming a rare commodity.

On rare occasions, you may be blessed with customers visiting your store; however, often, salespeople get caught up in their sale scripts, worrying more about their bottom line, and are not present with a fellow human being. They sell from their heads and not their hearts.

Every day, each of us goes to battle with ourselves because of all the noise in the world. We all suffer from ‘enough syndrome’ where we don’t feel we are enough, doing enough and being enough. We are continually bombarded with messages that we should be this, doing that, and consume this to fit in. It is exhausting. I believe customers are worn out, depressed, depleted, often feeling they are not good enough and worthy of being part of this world.

The old way of selling products and services no longer works. People are worn out being sold to with fear and manipulation. I often see these tactics used by coaches at three-day events were most participants aren’t even present after day one, because they feel less than. They spend the rest of the seminar wondering how they are going to get the money together to pay for the program being offered.

People more than ever are suspicious of any pitch and rebel now when sold to with fear and manipulation. The funny thing is most coaches don’t realize that if you attract clients with fear and manipulation, they too will be treated in the same way by others. The Law of Karma never forgets and is a loyal friend. Like attracts like.

Your customers are dying to be soothed and comforted by you. Be their friend, parent, sister, brother, lover, or friend. Just show up being yourself spending time with another human being. I promise you this approach will not only feel good but increase your bottom line and your reputation will proceed you. Word of mouth will bring you droves of clients because you are honest, genuine, sincere, and full of integrity. You will stand out from the rest.

I believe the only way to make it in sales today is to be your real self. Please burn your sales scripts. They are so unauthentically you. I don’t care how many times you practice them till they roll off your tongue, deep down know that it isn’t you. You feel ‘icky’ delivering them. You know your motives are wrong. It is the old way of selling like in the ‘90s.

The world is changing, and people are becoming more conscious and are sick and tired of the BS. They want genuine connections. My dear friend Larry Levine knows all about this. He wrote ‘Selling from the Heart’ with a passion for leading a revolution of authenticity, integrity, and substance in the sales profession.  

Ladies and Gentlemen burn your sales scripts. Please connect with your customers. They are dying to be seen, heard, and appreciated.

So how do you connect? For starters, be yourself. Stop being something you are not. I know it can be hard to let your true self shine through as we are all used to wearing masks. It can be hard to connect, especially if you don’t know who you are and aren’t in touch with your feelings.

In today’s world, people are anesthetizing themselves with addictions such as food, shopping, drugs, alcohol, sex, and the list goes on. Many don’t know how to have a soulful connection because they don’t even know who they are. A soulful connection has more depth than the general ‘chitta chatter.’ It involves not just sympathizing but empathizing.

Some people find this hard to do because they have not made peace with themselves. I know this for a fact, having worked in the arena of customer service for over 21 years. I used to fly for Qantas, traveling the world, working on their A380 fleet, serving the world’s elite, and looking after thousands of customers. It was my job to provide exceptional client experiences. It was exhausting because of so many to serve and jetlag. There were many times I was not myself, and I had to ‘fake it to make it.’

When I look back now, after five years of being out of the industry, I realize that I often lead with my head and not heart, because of the pressure to perform, meet KPI’s (key performance indicators) and ensure the safety of the A380 was not compromised. There were times; I hated being the custodian of exceptional customer service.

 I remember my one of my favorite mantras being: ‘I can’t want to get this over with.’ I often wanted to hide behind closed doors, under the covers. I couldn’t wait for each flight to be over so that I didn’t have to deal with one more customer. 

Upon reflection, I now realize that the real issue was not the customer but rather me. I didn’t know who I was or even loved myself. I didn’t want to face the tremendous fear inside of feeling less than; not good enough. I know I suffered from imposter syndrome. I didn’t feel worthy. I wore a mask and survived rather than thrived. Can anyone relate?

 Only recently have I started to love and make peace with me. I look back with regret. I wish I had known what I know now. I would have done it differently and treated each customer as divine appointments. I got so caught up in the results that I forgot to stay in the present moment and cherish each interaction.

The past is over, and that only power now is to change my future, with a different approach: 

• I have discovered that the more you love yourself, the richer your life becomes, not just financially but in all areas of your life.
• When you love yourself, people pick up on how you feel about YOU. You become very magnetic, and that magnetism attracts customers like ‘bees to a honey pot.’
• People love to be around people who love themselves.
• The more you love yourself, the less you worry about chasing money, property, prestige, and status.
• You realize YOU are the ‘pot of gold,’ and it is not outside of you.
• Real wealth is your health, connection to yourself, and others.

I challenge you this week to start loving yourself with simple acts of kindness such as listening more to your heart than head, ditching the sales scripts and stop eating that bag of potato chips or bar of chocolate, whatever is your poison!

Much love

Tanya

P.S. If you are interested in learning how to master the art of selling by creating a deeper connection to yourself, then join me on my journey of self-discovery. I have some terrific tools to support you to ‘clean up your closet’ and create a new version of YOU. The benefits will be substantial, including achieving your sales goals. [email protected]