You Don’t Have to React to Everything
Have you noticed how everything you encounter produces a reaction? Whatever you perceive, you instantly add a label that judges, describes and apportions meaning. It’s an automatic response, a conditioned reflex that owes its origins to our early childhood conditioning. The constant stream of thought and feeling provides a running commentary and an emotional template that frames everything you experience. It’s how we’ve evolved as a species. But, there are disadvantages to this automatic response behaviour. We often react to things that prompt anger, fear, frustration, indignation and insecurity. The question that we should ask is to determine whether these reactions are useful. Or not.
Our reactions, especially our negatively-charged emotions, consume a great deal of energy. That’s why we often feel exhausted by our feelings of anger, fear or frustration. But there is another way and it’s an alternative that’s been practised for thousands of years. The key is to learn to pause for a moment before reacting. It’s as if you catch yourself in the act of responding and freeze the film. In that fleeting instant, where you feel as if you’ve made time stand still, you can choose exactly how you wish to react.
When you think about it, getting upset or angry about anything doesn't help or improve the situation. And that’s a great place to start the process of engaging calm and measured reflection. Ask yourself what difference your feelings make to whatever you’re witnessing? It’s a great question. Most of the time, our reactions make absolutely no difference – expect, of course, to our health and happiness. Far better to choose not to react, to save your energy for maintaining your inner balance, peace and calm. The space where you pause is the key to choosing a wiser set of reactions rather than wasting your precious energy on disturbing your inner calm and equanimity. Choosing to be positive or to decide not to react at all is a very effective way to take control over the random jumble of thoughts and feelings that usually populate our stream of consciousness. It’s a powerful step on the pathway to self-mastery and a much healthier way of living.