ARE YOU CONSIDERING MOVING ABROAD BUT CAN'T FIND THE COURAGE?

People, especially fellow countrymen, often ask me how I moved from the small village I grew up in northern Italy (Robassomero, don’t even bother to find it in the map) to an international, multicultural and futuristic city like Dubai, with previous stops in the (equally charming) Malta, Switzerland and Dublin.

Last night, as I was looking at the skyline (I admit, sipping a glass of Bollinger) from the windows of my apartment on the 26th floor of a high-rise building in the financial centre of this incredible city, I reflected on the challenges I have experienced so far, and made a mental list of the things that have somehow enabled me to change my life in such a (only apparently) radical way.

Here’s a brief list of them.

I wrote them down hoping to help whoever is overwhelmed by the idea of leaving their own country, in search of a better opportunity.

1. IF I DID IT, YOU CAN DO IT TOO

I am not special by any means, and if anyone has strong links with his own roots, such as culture, language, land, family, food and habits, that is me.

I am so Italian that when I meet new people, I don’t even need to open my mouth to be recognised as one. Despite living abroad, I become more of an Italian as I get older.

Not only does this not limit my interactions with other cultures, but it makes them more interesting for both parties involved.

Besides that, I didn’t come here sponsored by anyone.

Except for my first move to Dubai in 2004 (after which I moved to Malta, Dublin and then back to Dubai) when I joined a fantastic company named Al Tayer, all other moves were the outcome of my vision and initiative.?

I seized the opportunity, made a list of pros and cons, talked to lawyers and accountants, learned all I could about local rules and regulations, and then started a business every time.

I cannot say the process was easy, but it’s definitely one that has helped me strengthen my vision and my determination to succeed.

2. HUMAN BEINGS GET USED TO PRETTY MUCH ANYTHING

We know that the survival of our species, and its (relative) dominance on the planet, results from adaptability, rather than physical strength.

People can adapt to any living condition (think of the hardest prisons, or the nazi concentration camps) and this is both a blessing and a curse.

In our conversation, however, it is the blessing we will focus on.

History teaches us how much the universe has changed ever since the first primate appeared on earth over 55 million years ago. Our species not only developed according to climate and geographical changes, but was also the one which could transform the environment for it to suit its development.

When moving abroad, the first days or weeks will feel as if you had landed on a new planet. You’ll hear people speak a foreign language, you will struggle to find your comfort food, people will (sometimes) dress differently, you’ll be surrounded by a different scent everywhere you go and you won’t recognise the landscape when you look out of your windows.

And then, before you know, all of this will feel natural.

Additionally, a globalised world has minimised the challenges listed above (for example, I can find most of my comfort food here, although not with the same variety and at the same price as in my home country). Also, many cultural differences are now less visible than only a few years ago because, whether we like it, we’re all more homologated than before.

3.THE BIGGER THE CITY, THE MORE EMPATHY YOU ARE LIKELY TO FIND

As counterintuitive as it may sound (we know big cities as places where people must develop a cutthroat approach to survive) I’ve experienced the opposite.

I found out that the larger the city, the more people will have experienced the struggle you experience as a new resident.

You will find many expatriates willing to share their own experience and to help you overcome the roadblocks you will inevitably find.

Many of these people will (likely) come from your own country, and as funny as it may sound, you’ll notice how easier it is to befriend them abroad, rather than at home.

This happens because back home everyone has their own circle of friends and family, and every time someone new pops up, they will see her or him as a stranger, even if they are coming from a village 2 Km away.

When you’re abroad, on the contrary, coming from the same country (let alone city!) creates an immediate bond.

You can also create a similar bond with expatriates from other countries (the closer the cultures, the faster the bond).

A rule of thumb, locals will be the hardest to get close to because, as mentioned before, they are likely to be deeply embedded in their social circle but once you prove you can be a valuable, other than diverse, addition to the group, they may be your best friends!?

4. DAILY ADAPTATIONS MAKE YOU GROW BY DEFAULT

Looking back, I reckon that every year I spent abroad was worth 5 years spent at home in terms of learning and personal growth.

Comfort is a threat to creativity and personal growth and I realised that every time I spend more than a few weeks in a row in my home country Italy, I end up going back to old habits and mind frames which, for better or worse, I thought I had got rid of.

For example, I tend to overeat, and to get into politics a little too much, resulting in a shift of focus from the things that really matter to me, to the ones that just surround me and which I am so familiar with.

When I am abroad I cut the noise, eat less, and focus on my priorities, and the interesting thing is that every time I have to shift my focus towards things I do not want to, or that I didn’t forecast (something that happens daily when you move to a new country) I at least learn something new.

Besides it, a detachment from your own culture makes you develop a deeper sense of self. You get to know yourself beyond your cultural boundaries and your comfort zone, and you gain an unprecedented clarity on your values and your priorities as a human being.

5. TECHNOLOGY MAKES IT 10X EASIER

I should say 100X easier.

When I first moved to Switzerland in 2002, most of us had no internet at home, let alone mobile internet, WhatsApp and free video-calls.?

All you had was a mobile phone and international calls would cost you an arm and a leg.

Just to put it into perspective, they released Blackberry in the same year, and it took a while before people got used to sending emails from a handset!

Back in the day, whether or not you liked it, you had to immerse yourself in the local daily life.?

Today, and I see it with my kids, unless you have daily obligations like school or a workplace to go to, you can cut up to 90% of your interactions with the local life and live as if you were still in your home country.?

You can speak, read and watch videos in your native language, and order your food from your country online.

I must admit that as comfortable as this technological advancement may be, it dilutes significantly the added value of living abroad, let alone travelling.?

6. YOU CAN ALWAYS GO BACK

I am fortunate. I came from a rich country I can always go back to and where my basic needs and rights are met regardless of my social and/or financial conditions.

I also know that many people can’t go back to their own country because of political, safety or economic reasons and I feel for them, and they have an extra reason to succeed in the country they moved to.?

But if like me, your country is a safe place to go back to, and you’re considering moving abroad to find a better opportunity, or simply to prove yourself, I invite you to consider your options, and try!

CONCLUSIONS:

If I learned anything living, starting several businesses and even giving birth to my children abroad, is that the world is full of opportunities and with a little of courage and imagination, you don’t have to limit your options to the village, the city or the country you were born in.

I’ve also learned that you don’t need to be home to feel at home and that meeting, and perhaps melting with new cultures, will not change who you are, but enrich you.

A few things are required though and they are:

1. An open mind, to see what other people see.
2. An open heart, to welcome those different from you.
3. Respect. To be welcomed wherever you go.
4. Humility, to relearn some of the (basic) things you take for granted.
5. Curiosity, to notice and enjoy the new things that will surround you.

I hope it helps, and good luck with your move!

Carlo

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