Are you committed, or committed "until"

The difference between these two is the tax you'll pay for not achieving your dreams.

It was about 3 years ago, sitting in a room with 30 people, who had gone from strangers to friends over the course of the last 12 weeks of the emotional intelligence training we were in, that I really understood what the line of demarcation was between these two statements.

It was also that day that I learned that most people play not to lose or are just playing, they don't actually play to win... and then there are those that are not playing ??. I'll share those definitions a bit later because they are important, but for right now I want to talk about being committed.

I am going to share a quick story. It was 6am when my alarm went off this morning. I knew what it meant.... I knew that it was time to do what I had committed to doing yesterday, going for a sunrise stroll, a new habit I am trying on.

But at 6am, all cozy in my bed, the seeds of committed until started to sprout.

And I said to myself "just 10 more minutes, the sun won't be up for another 30 anyways," I pressed snooze.

In between the snooze and the next beep...beep... beep I wrestled with the "facts" my mind was trying to use to trick me out of my commitment to myself.

It's just a walk, you need the sleep.

You can start tomorrow.

What if it's raining.

But then I remembered something VERY important that I want to share with you today.

It is these almost imperceptible choices that build up to make the big shifts that get us either closer or farther away from our goals and align us either in or out of vision.

I knew in that moment that as much as I DID NOT want to get out of bed, there was no other option because the vision I am committed to is one of health and longevity, and sleeping in and breaking a commitment to myself (dare I say the most important commitments there are) I was self sabotaging myself.

So I pulled myself together and got my butt on the trail, and kept my commitment (here's a gorg picture of Austin in the sunrise.)

We as leaders, business owners, high achievers all have goals and things we say we want, right? RIGHT!

So with that, hopefully, we also have a clear vision of where we want to go, the lives and businesses we want to create, the relationships we want, and the goals to get us there.

But what I notice in my clients, and in myself at times, is this.

We say we want those things....

...but when it comes down to it, the difference between having them or not is the difference between being committed no-matter-what and being committed until.

Don't let the itty-bitty-shitty-committee between your ears allow you to self sabotage yourself out of your dreams.

Don't sell your dreams short by letting yourself excuse you from what you said you are committed to. That is the path to regret, resentment, and unfulfilled lives.

So my question to you is this... where in your life, business, relationships, etc. have you broken a commitment to yourself?

Write them down, see which ones are still aligned/in vision, and then ask yourself if you are ready to be committed no matter what to that, and then get to work.

It's those tiny course adjustments towards where you want to go that will get you there, don't get off course by excusing yourself out of what you know you need to do to build the life you want.

Okay, now as promised earlier.

What is playing to win, playing not to lose, just playing, and not playing.

Here goes, I am going to explain this using a sports analogy.

Playing to win are your all-star starters. The people that are first to practice. Even when your not in season, they are training, they are doing everything they can to increase their chances of success and are there rain or shine. (1-5% of the population)

Playing not to lose are your B string. They are playing the game but just enough that they don't get kicked off the team. They come to practices but if someone isn't coaching them then they most likely aren't putting in the work to really be successful. (35-40% of the population)

Just playing is your practice team. They are showing up because they have to be there. They aren't focused on winning, improving, or really anything besides what I call, going through the motions. They are phoning it in until someone notices and requires them to either step up or get out to move on to something else. (55-60% of the population)

Not playing are your people who tried out for the team and never made it, but tell you about how unfair the tryouts were. How, because it rained and the field was slippery, they got cut. They are the ones that are the constant complainers, the victims that think life is happening to them, that life is unfair, or constantly say that XYZ is "rigged." They have vast potential but would rather waste it commiserating in their disappointment or why they can't do something rather than finding a way. (10-15% of the population)

Now those definitions might have triggered some of you and as the kids say #sorrynotsorry

Hopefully those 4 shook you out of your passenger seat and into awareness that YOU, and only you, are the driver of your life.

I bet if you go through the people you know in your mind, you can quickly see who is where, so the question I have for you is this... what quadrant are you currently in and what one do YOU want to be in?

My hope for you is that with Today's edition of the Biz Doctor Newsletter you feel empowered to play to win to be committed to creating the life you want no matter what life or your brain throws at you.

We need your gifts, your uniqueness, your impact so as they say in Toy Story, run like the wind bullseye!

Until next time,

Lauren