Are You Chasing Someone Else’s Success? ??

What is success, anyway? This question has been at the forefront of my mind lately, especially as I approach my 50th birthday and find myself surrounded by friends who are also reevaluating the social definition of success we've been force fed throughout our lives.

Money, power and influence will bring you all that you need.

It’s almost comical how wrong I was. As I climbed the ladder of success, I found myself increasingly confused about what truly made me happy. I was so focused on achieving someone else's gold standard that I overlooked my own values. It took me nearly 40 years to realize that wealth and status aren't my personal markers of success. First, I had to define what success meant to me before I could chart a path to achieve it.

Recently, in my book club, we were challenged to create our own definitions of success. What became clear as everyone shared was how little we actually needed. Most of what we sought was free: simple joys, meaningful connections, and time spent doing what we love. One friend categorized her interests into twelve areas, dedicating each month to focus on one. Brilliant! For me, I wrote a list of all the things that bring me happiness, and keep it on my bedside table and in my phone for easy reference.

My definition of success is…

~ living a life doing work that is both purposeful and impactful and being paid my worth

~ making time to do the things that bring me happiness

~ attempting to remain in the present to appreciate those things ????

Yes, I hear you in the back: money is essential! And you're absolutely right! I think everyone should make as much money as they want as it is a powerful exchange that affords you great opportunities. But for years, I didn’t even know what I was making money for; it was just a cycle of “more, more, more.” Now, I have clarity about what I want. Travel is certainly on my list, and I need money to fund those adventures. But so are hiking, swimming, dancing, laughing, deep conversations with loved ones, reading great books, basking in the sun on my porch, and spending quality time with family and friends. This week, I was fortunate to experience all of these joys because I know what makes me happy and intentionally design my life around those activities. This was a successful week (and success doesn’t mean zero struggle either btw as there was plenty of struggle this week, too!). Life isn’t perfect, and I don’t always manage to incorporate everything I want, but I strive to make those fulfilling moments happen more often than not.

What’s your definition of success? I’d love to hear your thoughts!