Are You Chasing Behaviors?

Imagine you are standing on top of your kitchen table with me, and your kitchen table is perched 570 feet off the ground. We have built our anchor; it is holding us to the wall. You need to attach yourself to the anchor with a metal clip you’ve probably seen it’s called a carabiner. (There are two types of carabiners: nonlocking, meaning the gate can open and close easily, and locking, which have a small sleeve that you easily and quickly screw shut. This simple mechanism prevents the gate from opening accidentally.) So, you are attached to our anchor with a single locking carabiner.

Would you take two seconds to lock the carabiner shut?

Of course!

As a general rule, I (and most other Western climbers I know) typically use two separate locking carabiners to stay attached to anchors at all times.

Not my Russian climbing partner Dima.

As soon as I noticed this, I said “Dima—you need to lock your carabiner!”

“Manley, not necessary!”

What?

I then looked at Dima’s wife Jula’s carabiner. Same scenario.

She was hanging 570 feet off the ground, attached to the wall with only one carabiner, and did not have the gate locked.

“Jula, you have to lock your carabiner; you could come unclipped and fall!”

Jula responded in a sweeter tone of voice, but the message was the same.

“Manley, really, not necessary!”

Wow.

I kept telling them they needed to lock their carabiners. Over and over, I repeated my concern that they needed to do it. Then I just started doing it for them, reaching over and screwing the gate lock for them. Eventually, after several anchors, they would see me coming and reluctantly screw the gate shut, just so I wouldn’t aggravate them about it. They were complying, at best, but I know they didn’t believe it was necessary.

Have you ever had to gain compliance in your life or business? With Dima and Jula and their carabiners, I was chasing the behavior, first by telling the person what I needed, over and over. Then I get tired of telling them, right? So I started doing it for them, hoping they would learn by watching and finally get it.

This insight contains the power to help you make dramatic leaps in the results you achieve. At first, this path may feel like it is more work on the front-end. It is. The results are not only more sustainable, they are also significantly more impactful to long-term momentum and success. I look back now and wonder how much faster I could have gotten not just compliance, but commitment if I had challenged Dima and Jula’s beliefs about their safety systems.

Can telling a person what you want, need, and expect work? Definitely. Is leading by example often effective? Absolutely. But if these are the only two methods you have to lead with, you are going to miss out on a massive opportunity to get the results you want much faster. I’ve done this over and over in business and also in raising my kids. It took me fifteen years before I really understood what I was doing and why it took so long to even get compliance from my Russian partners on this simple lesson.

Stop chasing behaviors; start challenging beliefs.

A simple question can be extraordinarily powerful. “Why do you believe you don’t need to lock your carabiner?” I think asking that question would have been a game changer.

The next time you notice a behavior that you believe is not driving the results you want, instead of trying to chase the behavior into compliance, ask yourself or the person who is demonstrating the behavior, what belief is driving the action or choice. I found myself chasing behaviors in business all too often—even simple operational behaviors, like following a process or using a recommended tool.

I was involved in a massive multimillion-dollar business project. We had rolled out a new tool that revolutionized how our employees accessed critical business information across the organization. The rollout and technology were delivered within scope and by all measures had exceeded expectations. The only problem was people were not using it; we did not get the behavior we expected or desired. At first, we sent more communications about how important it was for them to use it and how we wanted them to use it. We had leaders in the organization demonstrate using it, step-by-step. Finally we asked our people, “Why do you believe it’s not necessary to use the new system?” Many expressed their belief that it was too hard to use and not any better than the old way. This insight enabled us to focus our efforts on specifically shifting their perspective of the new system to believing it was easier and better. Before we knew it, people throughout the organization shifted their beliefs about the new system, and mass adoption quickly followed.

In work and life, it is too easy to slip into a habit of chasing behaviors, as managing the behaviors we see in ourselves and others is a fundamental part of managing our lives. Managing is not leading. Effective leadership requires us to look beneath the surface of the behavior at beliefs and internal drivers.

To learn more about my 9 Vertical Lessons for Leading with Impact check out my new book Reaching Your Next Summit!

Your climb to excellence is never easy. The human drive within calls us to what is possible. The principles shared in this book will renew your commitment and inspire your quest for excellence. You will realize more of your potential as you sharpen your focus, act with courage, and generate momentum in reaching your next summit—and beyond.