You Can Be Anything You Want! (sort of)

It's been a while.

It's been a while since I did this.

It's been a while since I let loose on a personal topic to this degree and length. But I felt 1000% compelled to after learning of the plight of someone. A plight that I absolutely believe occurs every single day in every corner of the world.

In my career, I have been blessed to have been given the opportunity to speak to college students at various institutions of higher learning including Wharton and Harvard, among others. One consistent message I always make sure I leave everyone with is the undeniable truth that they can be anything they want; that they should never stop chasing their dreams and nothing or no one stand in their way.

Introducing Mary

Mary is A) a fictitious name and B) a composite of several people; people I have had the pleasure of getting to know. Mary has a dream. She wants to be a chemical engineer. Currently a senior in high school, Mary has her sights set on enrolling in a college which will allow her to pursue her dream.

And while her grades in high school are very good, they are not what would one call "stellar" or even what society would deem "chemical engineering-worthy" - whatever that means.

But Mary has a passion for this chemical engineering. Lord does she ever. She exudes this passion every time you talk to her. It's a sight to behold quite honestly for I always say "you can't fake passion."

NOTE: Before reading on, I want you to realize something VERY important. What you are reading is not mutually exclusive for someone like Mary; a high-school senior or someone near that age. This is applicable to ANYONE at ANY age for I will bet you many of you were in Mary's predicament 10, 20, 30, 40 years ago and did not know what to do and in turn, perhaps you followed THEIR dream and not YOUR OWN. I'm here to tell you it's ok and IT IS NOT TOO LATE. It never is.

Ah but there's trouble in the land for not only did Mary's high school counselors advise her against pursuing a career in this field so too did her friends and most notably, her parents. In fact, her parents flat-out refuse to support her in her quest, telling her on more than one occasion she is making "a serious mistake."

Stick To What We Think You Know

Mary's family is primarily comprised of blue-collar workers; her family has owned a highly-successful landscaping business - with multiple locations in multiple cities - for over 35 years. Her mom, dad, brothers, sisters, and even aunts, and uncles ALL are involved in the family business in one way or another.

As a child, Mary was always told "You can be anything you want!" And she believed that.

That is until the time came for Mary to make her own decision about what she wanted to be. She tells of the time she first told her family that she did not want to follow in their footsteps, opting instead to follow her dreams; to create her own path.

Thinking she would receive unconditional support, she got the exact opposite.

"But you told me I could be anything I want?" she queried her parents.

What Mary did not know then but sadly does now is what her parents really meant was You Can Be Anything You Want! (well, sort of)?

Your Perceptions Vs. Their Dreams

The world over, I believe, is full of stories just like Mary's. The parents, parental figures, or guardians of someone have a self-imposed perception of what their child(ren) should do with their life when it comes to a profession.

It's self-imposed of course because it's what THEY did in THEIR life; the career THEY chose and on and on. So when the time comes for their child(ren) to choose a career, it is downright sacrilegious to even consider doing anything other than what THEY believe their child(ren) should do.

Mary once told me her father said to her once, after learning of her interest in chemical engineering, "I want you to have a real job."

Mary was, as was I, confused by what this meant but then it hit me. In her father's eyes, a real job is one like his; one where you get your hands dirty, literally; where you break a sweat and feel like you put in an honest day's work.

Last Words

Being the pop-culture savant that I am, it's only fitting I end this with a pop-culture reference, in this case, a scene from the film Rocky Balboa. In the scene, Balboa is pleading his case about being denied a license to box again. Watch the scene and imagine Mary is Balboa and all the naysayers are the committee members.