Are you being unapologetically YOU?

As we evolve and work on ourselves our relationships change and evolve as well. This has been the hardest part of my spiritual development and I have assisted many of my clients with this. It helps when you can know that everyone is on their own journey and there is no “better than”. You know when you are about to spend time with someone, whether that be a romantic relationship, a friend or a co-worker how you feel. Are you excited, happy and looking forward to spending time with that person? Or are you dreading it or feeling a little anxious because you feel you cannot be 100% authentic? On this journey every single person we meet is a teacher and sometimes people come in and out of our lives but are not consistently on the journeys with us. Others we meet for a short period of time BUT they might have had a profound effect on our lives and the trajectory of our lives.

Once you stop the judgement and move into “noticing” it gets easier. Noticing how you feel before you interact with the person is a tell tale sign. Yes, there might be some boundaries, some uncomfortable conversations and some honest looking at yourself about WHY you are triggered by this person. If these are approached with LOVE instead of judgement, anger, guilt or resentment that “things can’t just stay the same” it is MUCH easier. I want to ask you this… If you knew a friend was dreading seeing you or a co-worker really was triggered by you would you WANT that relationship to be the same exact way in your life? When you are not bringing 100% LOVE and your authentic self into a relationship IT DOES NOT SERVE EITHER of YOU! I am not talking about little periods of time where one thing or another comes up and you need to and CAN work through it. I am speaking about when you KNOW this relationship makes you and most likely the other person uncomfortable, you have TRIED fixing it and it is OBVIOUSLY NOT in the highest versions of yourselves but you keep replaying the same patterns.

I often have to “give permission” to my clients to take an honest look at their relationships. Of course my permission is NOT necessary for ANYTHING but they FEEL they need it to absolve themselves of the guilt that often comes when they know they need to step away or firmly reestablish boundaries in a relationship. YOU teach people how to treat you and there is wiggle room sometimes and with SOME PEOPLE to reestablish boundaries as you change. But sometimes you need to take that that honest look, a deep breath, hand on your heart, eyes closed and ask yourself if this relationship is in the highest good of you and the other person as it is right now. If not, please do not beat yourself up or put the blame on anyone. Sometimes it just IS. Sometimes a conversation will need to be had and other times you will just feel the bond between you fading. Do not cling to what no longer serves you as then you are not making room for anything else. You deserve relationships that reflect the inner work you have done and continue to do.

Many times I will ask my clients to join a meetup locally that has something they like to do; hiking, meditating, etc. Please do not feel you are leaving anyone behind because our journeys are not straight arrows.. they twist and turn and double back and move forward. You never know who might reappear years later when you thought that relationship was over. What matters is NOW. What relationships are and are not serving you NOW? What action can you take that is aligned with our highest good to show, “YES, I love myself and this other person and can set healthy boundaries OR release them in love if necessary?” You deserve to bring YOUR best self into every interaction. Notice the people who bring you a sense of JOY and you feeling 100% authentically and unapologetically yourself! Spend more time with them! If you feel you do not have these people in your life - set the intention you are ready for them and take an action to meet some! This journey IS important to share with others who are loving and supportive. You know who lights your soul up and makes you feel comfortable being you. This deserves to be honored for EVERYONE’s sake. I am sending you much love as you take this honest look and know you DO deserve the absolute best which is a reflection of the love you DO have for yourself. I am wishing you a beautiful week ahead! I am grateful for each and every one of you for being on this journey with me!