Are You Being Bullied or Is It Something Else?

Bullying, bullying, bullying – it’s all over social media and in the news.

Bullying in healthcare is on the rise. Numerous studies report the negative impact bullying behaviors have on employee performance, retention, and patient outcomes. Of the new nurses who quit their first job within the first six months, 60% are quitting due to the bad behavior of their coworkers. We are hemorrhaging really great nurses to this problem. 

However, not all bad behaviors are bullying and when we label every negative encounter with a colleague as bullying, we do a disservice to true bullying. As they say, if all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. So, let’s get very clear about what bullying is and what it is NOT!

BULLYING IS:

For a behavior to be considered bullying, it has to include 3 things:

1.   A Target

There HAS to be a target. This target can be a single person or group of people. For example, someone might pick on just one new nurse and make her life a living hell but is nice to everyone else. Group targets can include the opposite shift (nurse on days hates all nurses on nights), all new nurses, or nurses who have a particular ethnic background. The key here is that there HAS to be a target.

2.   Harmful

The behavior has to be harmful in some way. This harm can be to the target (spreading false rumors in a way that undermines someone's credibility, excluding someone deliberately, or physical harm) or harmful to a patient (a nurse who sabotages or sets a nurse up for failure, affecting patient care). Sorry to say that eye rolling by itself isn’t harmful. The key here is that the behavior has to be harmful to an individual or patients.

3.   Repeated

The behavior has to be repeated over time. The behavior can’t be just a one-time event (I yell at you during a crisis situation). Some experts say six months or more. I disagree. I would consider a behavior as bullying if it repeated several times over the course of a few weeks or so. The key here is that the behavior HAS to be repeated.

BULLYING IS NOT:

·     The manager holding staff accountable for performance.

Many nurses complain that their boss is bullying them because they were put on corrective action for not following policy, not coming into work on time, calling off too many times, not giving medications, etc. This is NOT bullying! This is about being held accountable for your nursing practice.

·     Conflict and/or expressing a different opinion

Just because you have conflict or disagree with a coworker or your boss doesn’t mean either of you are bullies. Conflict is different. Conflict is NOT bullying.

·     Having a bad day and getting “testy” with your coworkers.

Let’s face it. Nurses work in stressful environments FILLED with unpredictability and complexity. And, we are not always on our best behavior when under stress. I challenge any one of you to claim that you’ve NEVER done or said something unprofessional at work when under stress. It’s a human thing. However, we are not all bullies!

What I find in most healthcare organizations is SOME bullying but not as much as you think. However, what I find is an awful lot of incivility.

INCIVILITY

Incivility is different from bullying. While the behaviors can be similar, they tend to be lower level. Incivility shows up as eye rolling, gossip, favoritism, etc. However, make no mistake about it, incivility is a healthy and professional workplace killer! Incivility needs to be addressed too but bullying should be a NEVER event.

Incivility is CULTURE and to change a culture you have to employ a different strategy.

It’s important to distinguish bullying from everything else. Why? Because how you address bullying is different. Bullying is ACTIONABLE. You have policies for this. Incivility, however, is culture.

ERADICATING BULLYING

Bullying behaviors tend to be more actionable because most organizations have policies that address bullying. Get a copy of your policy and use the language in that policy to take action against bullying.

Never ignore complaints of bullying (whether it truly is or isn’t).

CHANGING A CULTURE

Organizational culture evolves over time. Even within an organization, subcultures develop within units and departments. In general, people who have worked in the same department get comfortable with the way things are and may be resistant to change, even if they spend time complaining about how things are! Therefore, it’s important for the leader to create a positive, professional, and supportive work culture that rejects bullying and incivility.

The key is to evaluate all bad behavior (don’t use silence as a strategy) and then get clear about whether or not the behavior is bullying or something else. Changing a bullying culture to a professional one can often be challenging but change IS possible! The fight against bullying requires employers and employees working together to recognize and take action against disruptive behaviors that undermine a culture of safety and respect.

Thanks so much for reading!

Take care. Be kind. Stay connected.