Are You Afraid Of Success

It is well documented and often talked about that many people fail to achieve their goals in life due to the phenomenon known as "fear of failure" but are you aware that a major factor that is often overlooked, is a state known as "fear of success"? 

Fear of failure will lead many people into inertia - the inability to make decision or take action in case they receive rejection or negative outcomes, they get stuck in a state of procrasination or analysis paralysis. This mental state is fairly easy to identify and there are many tools in the personal development industry to help combat this plague and reprogram the mind for success. It usually only comes with actually taking action of some sort. However, the fear of success is much more subtle, harder to spot and also harder to eradicate. 

You might think why the hell would someone fear success, aren't they saying they want to be successful? Well yes but this fear is like any other fear and can be justified by the person suffering from it, but like any fear it is something you can overcome and work through, you just need to identify it first, call it out for what it is.

Perhaps you are someone who has this tendency in your life. If so here are some indications of a fear of success mentality. 

Studying and trying to implement self-improvement techniques and/or personal development tools but your life does not improve or may even get worse. 

You settle for less than you feel you deserve or are capable of achieving. 

You start new projects full of enthusiasm and optimism but wane in your efforts or stop short before you have completed them. 

You expect things to go wrong no matter how well the situation appears to be at the moment. 

Can you identify your own patterns in the any of the above statements? 

The fear of success can also make you behave in ways that hold you back. Look at the list below. These are the symptoms of the fear of success. 

Procrastination - putting off what needs to be done or not doing what you know will bring you closer to your desired result. Everyone suffers from this inner 'demon' at some point in their lives (although some of us suffer from it more than others!). 

Procrastination is a 'success killer'! How can you expect to reach your destination if you do not take steps towards it? Strive to do little things each day that will bring you small steps closer to your goal. This is why having a personal development plan is an essential ingredient in the fight against procrastination. Take action! Any action! Refine your steps as you go along but do not sit and do nothing. Taking action is one of the key aspects in personal development. 

Can't see the forest for the trees! - this is almost the opposite of procrastination but has the same effect on your personal development. This common saying is well known but have you ever given it real consideration? 

Don't get caught up in your plan believing that it is more important than the materialised goal! For many years I got caught in this trap. I started to think and act as though my plan was more important than my end result and thus missed many opportunities to alter my path and reach my goals more quickly! Sometimes I can be guilty of planning things o death, always stuck in the planning mode but never actually getting any further ahead because I was wasting so much time ensuring I was planning every last minute and I couldn't do something that wasn't part of the plan. Because despite how well you plan, life is fluid and you can not no matter how hard you try plan for every occasion. Let go of your ego and allow the Universe to show you a quicker route to your goal. Remain flexible. 

Thinking that the time is not right - have you ever waited until the timing was perfect before starting a venture? Have you ever waited until you had more information on a better plan? I know I waited so long on several ideas and inspirational downloads I had, and this was simply out of fear, but what happened, I stayed stuck and someone else swooped in and got started with my idea, with a few of these making an absolute killing. To some degree I held back even more then by beating myself up over it. What I had to do was detach and realise what had happened, had happened and there wasn't much I could do to change that but I could prevent it happening again by taking the damn action and implementing the ideas, not holding back for fear of judgment, for fear of failure, for fear of not being good enough, but most of all for fear of success.

Again ACTION is the key to the door to success. Taking small steps forward are better than taking none or waiting to see if your foot is landing on the right spot! Even if your actions take you away from your goal you have at least gained insight and knowledge about what does not work! 

Being a perfectionist - this is similar to the point above and has the same effect, namely, that you never really move forward. Aww, this one is a killer! I always describe myself as a recovering perfectionist, because I truly believe it is something you have to keep working on. No matter how good a job is when its finished it can always be improved! This was so hard for me to hear, I used to pride myself on being a perfectionist until it started holding me back in life and then when I deep dived into personal development and I learnt that this wasn't necessarily a good quality. It was such a kick in the teeth to find out that perfection doesn't actually exist, it is just an illusion we are constantly chasing, or at the very least it is subjective to each and everyone of us. I have heard many great musicians tell how they hate listening to their own songs because they can find a million things that need improved. Yet, we still enjoy them. I think a classic example of this is "Bridge Over Troubled Water" by Paul Simon. This song is hauntingly beautiful yet Mr. Simon does not think its good enough! Another classic example is that most artists aren't recognised until they are dead because they never really thought that any of their projects or pieces were good enough to really go after.

Seeing only problems - how do you use your focus? Do you constantly see only and all the problems involved? If you are this way inclined it is pointless trying to change overnight! However, you can use this mindset to your advantage while you strive in your personal development to acquire an opportunistic frame of mind instead. 

"How can you use seeing only problems to my advantage?" you say. "Easily", is my reply! Look at the problems and prepare a plan to deal with them. Everytime you overcome one congratulate yourself. Use them as a gauge for your achievements. If you keep seeing more problems remind yourself of how well you dealt with the others. Look at how far you have come! If you see a problem ask yourself, "how best can I overcome this challenge?" or "how quickly can I rectify this situation?". The quality of your questions are important as I have outlined in a previous article. Use the problems as fact finders. Is there a real problem now? If so then deal with it. Is it a potential problem? If so then create a contingency plan in case it does occur but don't get caught up in it just be prepared. 

Enjoy the journey, follow the above guidelines, or at least take what resonates with you and leave what doesn't, implement those and you will achieve success. Eventually your fear of success will dissipate and you will have moved a long way forward in your personal development.