Are you a #1 or a #2

“Emotional labor is the work of doing what we don’t feel like doing.? We do this work, this draining emotional labor, because we’re professionals, and because we want to make change happen.”? Seth Godin

Somewhere along the line we moved away from this concept of emotional labor.? As if success is a video game and all about me getting what I want.

We get a job and expect to get the right pay, the right amount of vacation, and the privilege of only doing the work that we want to do.?

This is a failing perspective and an easy trap to fall into.?

In order for me to get the pay, the vacations and do the work I want to do, I must be valuable.? And to be valuable people need to value me.? And why would they value me if I’m only worried about myself???

"When our relationships with others are based on only the pleasure they give us, those relationships are merely childish."  
Jacques Philippe        

This idea is the great equalizer across all roles and all industries…

The CEO looking to take the organization on a new path of success.? The nurse looking to help provide a better level of care to patients.? The first year accountant working to please both the client and the senior on the audit.? The salesperson trying to both make the sale and delight the customer.

In every scenario we must do the hard work of putting others first.? Without that upfront decision, we run the risk of subconsciously putting ourselves first.

This isn’t heroic, it’s common sense that is really challenging.

Whether it’s my clients, my spouse, my boss, my kids, or those reporting to me, for me to be successful with any of them, I must be willing to put them first.

If my focus is on “me” I’ll be drawn towards what’s comfortable, what feels good and what makes me happy.? If my focus is on them I’ll be drawn towards how I can improve, how I can help, and what I can do to make them happy.?

…..enter the topic of clothing….

If your clients and peers assessed what they see you wearing, would they think the focus is:

1. Them and what you’re building with them???
2. Yourself and your more insulated desires??

Our life perspective is revealed in how we talk, what we do and how we look.? Clothes are either helping us move beyond ourselves or closing us in.

The next certification is great.? Going back to school is never bad.? Being more responsive to your boss or the board is good. Reviewing the new metrics with your team is smart.? Updating your resume might make sense.

But for heaven’s sake, don’t forget the low hanging fruit.? Try a sportcoat.