The YES problem

Take this instance: Your colleague asks you to help him/her out on a project and given that they have always been there when you needed help, you end up saying yes even though you are drowning in deadlines. You do this because you do not want to upset your colleague.

Does this sound familiar? Sometimes we end up saying yes even though we are not in the mind space to take up the work or help somebody.?

I have experienced this. I have the habit of taking up work from every client who approaches me. Adding on excess work takes away precious time from my family. In the run-up to completing some impractical tasks, my children had to confiscate my phone on Sundays because of an overflow of work! Professionally, the effect is long-term, it takes a toll on my integrity as a professional.?

Why is this problem so common among people??

And what can one do about it??

Simply search, “Why do I find it hard to say no” and you will find several blogs trying to explain the problem and ways to deal with it. This is how common it is among people. “Looking good”, “seeming admirable”,“ wanting to help people” and the fear of “losing an opportunity” are some of the common reasons.?

However, by doing so, are you doing justice to the person you are saying yes to and yourself??

When saying ‘yes’ to a person, they rely on me. At the time of delivery, if I am unable to keep up with my word, that person is left stranded especially if they are running on a timeline. So, am I really helping that person?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

One thing that has worked amazingly well for me is connecting people. If I am unable to help a known person for any reason, I simply reach out in my network. By strategically connecting people, I am able to help both the individuals at hand. This has certainly made life easier. Of course, I need to be sure of the capabilities of the person I have referred. A great side benefit is that slowly and steadily, collaborations and partnerships have emerged due to this.