Unmasking the Inner Critic: The Imposter, the People Pleaser, and the Outsider
Megan Dalla-Camina
Founder & CEO Women Rising | Women Rising book | Winner Telstra Business Award 2024 Accelerating Women | Partnering with 730+ companies with Women Rising and Male Allies programs | PhD researcher. womenrisingbook.com
In the first part of our series on inner critic archetypes, we explored how deeply ingrained narratives shape our thoughts and impact our self-perception. These archetypes are universal representations, patterns that resonate across experiences and help us to better understand the complex nature of self-doubt, self-criticism, and the external pressures many women face.
In Women Rising , we delve into thirteen unique archetypes, each reflecting societal expectations, personal fears, and unconscious beliefs that influence how we think, feel, and act. By recognising these archetypes, we start to see the stories that hold us back and learn how to transform them.
In this article, we’ll look the next three archetypes: The Imposter, The People Pleaser, and The Outsider. Each of these personas offers a glimpse into the fears and self-doubt that shape our choices, and by unmasking them, we can take the first steps toward reclaiming our confidence and power.
The Imposter: “Who Am I to Do That?” – The Incessant Underminer
The Imposter lives with persistent self-doubt, believing that any success is due to luck rather than personal capability. This archetype downplays accomplishments and hesitates to share ideas, convinced that they’ll soon be “found out” as a fraud. The Imposter frequently feels unqualified and assumes others are more capable or deserving, which stifles ambition and limits potential.
The Imposter’s inner critic relentlessly feeds self-doubt and fear of exposure, holding them back from seizing new opportunities and embracing their successes. This inner narrative distorts accomplishments, making them feel undeserved and fuelling a cycle of undervaluing oneself.
Key Reflection Questions
Transforming the Imposter: Transforming the Imposter involves embracing accomplishments and building self confidence. Recognise that your achievements are a result of your own efforts and abilities. Acknowledge your hard work, replace self-critical thoughts with affirmations, and take pride in the journey that brought you to where you are.
The People Pleaser: “I Want Them to Like Me” – The Constant Harmoniser
The People Pleaser is driven by a deep desire for approval, often prioritising others’ needs over their own. This archetype fears letting people down and constantly seeks validation, even at personal expense. Saying “no” feels impossible, and the People Pleaser often compromises their own needs to keep everyone happy.
The People Pleaser’s inner critic fosters a need for external validation, urging them to put others first to feel valued and accepted. This self-sacrificing voice leads to burnout, as the People Pleaser struggles to set boundaries and feels responsible for others’ happiness.
Key Reflection Questions
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Transforming the People Pleaser: Transforming the People Pleaser starts with setting healthy boundaries and prioritising self-care. Practice saying “no” without guilt, and recognise that your worth is not tied to others’ approval. Embrace self-validation and start celebrating your own needs, knowing they are just as important.
The Outsider: “I Don’t Belong Here” – The Stranded Nomad
The Outsider often feels different or excluded in certain environments, especially in situations where they are a minority. This archetype feels a strong need to prove themselves, working extra hard to gain acceptance and avoid judgment. Despite their efforts, they frequently feel isolated, unworthy, or on the “outside looking in.”
The Outsider’s inner critic emphasises their differences, creating a sense of inadequacy and self-doubt. It convinces them they must constantly prove themselves to be accepted, making it difficult to relax, share their true selves, or feel confident in new environments.
Key Reflection Questions
Transforming the Outsider: Transforming the Outsider involves celebrating your unique qualities and cultivating confidence in your authentic self. Embrace your strengths, and recognise that your differences are assets, not flaws. Find communities where you feel valued, and build resilience against self-doubt by grounding your worth in your unique perspective.
These archetypes represent common narratives many women grapple with. By understanding each one, we take a significant step toward untangling the stories that hold us back. The journey of self-awareness and growth is ongoing, and as we recognise and challenge these archetypes, we make space for a more authentic, empowered version of ourselves.
Stay tuned for the next part of our series, where we’ll continue to unmask more archetypes, empowering you to take control of your narrative and silence the inner critic.
For a deeper dive into each archetype, check out Women Rising – a guide to not only identifying these archetypes but also equipping yourself with tools to transform them. Get your copy wherever good books are sold.